by Ada Porat | Jul 28, 2017 | Conscious living, Life coaching, Mindfulness
A garden delights every sense – the whirring of hummingbirds among the lavender plants, the feel of rich, soft dirt between our fingers, bright colors of ripening fruit in the orchard, the taste of a freshly picked tomato. And yet, true garden lovers know that the benefits of gardening aren’t just physical. From season to season, gardens teach valuable life lessons that help us grow as individuals.
- Learning to adapt can save you a lot of heartache
Author and avid gardener H. Fred Dale famously said that his green thumb came only as a result of the mistakes he made while learning to see things from the plant’s point of view. There are gardeners who battle against the elements, fighting to put a specific plant in a specific place, only to find that the same pests return year after year to destroy their best-laid plans. Why won’t it grow?
Sometimes the answer may be in refraining from imposing one’s will on nature and instead learning where the plant does want to be and what growing conditions it thrives in. When we align with nature as with life, we tend to generate optimal outcomes with less struggle and much more satisfaction.
- Optimism is important
Gardening is a matter of your enthusiasm holding you up until your back gets used to it. Seed catalogs arrive when snow is still on the ground in most places, and garden planning is really just a vision in the gardener’s mind. Time is a great healer that lets us remember the good while forgetting the pain. During winter, last year’s failures and the hard knots in my lower back fade away just long enough to dream of an even better garden this year. It lets me forget about the annoying javelinas who trampled my flower beds and the sneaky raccoons who dug up my bulbs.
Believing that the future holds the possibility of better things, new growth, and abundant rain is the first step to making good things happen.
- Pruning is a reality of life
Author James Clear said that ideas are like rose bushes: they need to be consistently pruned and trimmed down. One of my most challenging gardening projects involves the necessary discipline of pruning: cutting back fruit trees and shrubs to remove dead branches and shape their growth. It’s like giving tough love to the garden even when I know that pruning is essential for plant health. The tree that strains to bear all the fruit on its limbs to ripeness, will bear smaller fruit and risk breaking limbs. Pruning and thinning out excess fruit allows for larger, better yields. And the shrub that has been pruned, will come back bushier and more vital next season. Ah, a tough but necessary life lesson here!
In life as in gardening, tasks and responsibilities have a way of proliferating until they smother the essential things of our lives. Optimal growth and living requires pruning. By shedding non-essential demands and energy drains, we can more effectively focus on the truly important issues that will let us thrive.
- It’s okay to be alone
There are people who revel in being alone, yet most individuals abhor being alone in quiet spaces, accompanied only by thoughts. In the magical environment of my garden, it always feels okay to be out amidst the plants, sweating and tending each plant, feeling the satisfaction and pride of a well-tended garden while being absolutely alone. Research studies have proven beyond doubt that the simple act of gardening alleviates depression. If you must choose between meditation in a quiet room and meditating through gardening, you’ll find it far easier to empty your mind in the physical exertion of a garden by sitting in silence.
In the garden surrounded by breezes, bees, birds and crawly things, being alone only means there is not another human near; it does not mean you are lonely or isolated. Since trading frenetic city life for the simplicity of country living, I find myself renewed by my garden daily. The bounty of nature is perfect company!
- Every good thing requires hard work
First-time gardeners are often surprised by the time it takes to create a bountiful garden. Tending a garden is a worthy way to help nurture and heal our world, but it takes effort: real effort that may lead to plenty of sweat and aching limbs. The reward more than compensates us for the effort: bite into a fresh red tomato and you’ll understand. Or notice your health improving as you eat more fresh organic veggies that you have lovingly cultivated and you will forget the effort it took.
It is similar to the process of raising children, growing a business, or developing a meaningful relationship. Building something worthwhile takes commitment, diligence and lots of effort! Hard work is the secret ingredient for every good thing that we develop over time.
- Failure is a necessary stepping stone to success
As in life, a garden is always a series of losses along with a few triumphs that we can learn from. Every year in the garden is a story of both failure and success. Which type of lettuce will do better in the heat? Why did I have so many Japanese beetles? Why didn’t the carrots sprout? It’s an experiment that takes place season after season, and there is no perfect formula that will protect against the ever-changing variables. What worked one year might not work the next because gardening happens in harmony with the dynamics of nature, not in lockstep with a static calendar or formula.
Nature is forever evolving, and there are no guarantees or bulletproof formulas. For every change that ensures success, there will be changes that bring failure. The solution does not lie in hanging up my gardening gloves, but in continuing to observe, learn the life lesson it offers and grow. Every failure shows me what not to do, and opens up possibilities for adaptation… and that flexibility leads to success in gardening just as it does in life.
- The unexpected can often be beautiful and magnificent
Just like seasons in the garden, life is short, fraught with the unexpected, filled with adversity, and never seems to go as we planned. It’s also magnificent in its beauty as we experience love and laughter, adventures and small joys that fill us with sublime happiness.
The happiest moments in life are seldom planned – instead, it’s their spontaneity that fill us with delight. Making plans are good but when we hit the dirt, it is invaluable to keep an open mind to all life has to offer. The surprising twists and turns of life offer great gifts, provided we stay open to the unexpected.
About the author
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
by Ada Porat | Dec 20, 2016 | Change bad habits, Conscious living, Mindfulness, Self-awareness
The power of our minds can be harnessed to empower us. It can also sabotage our best intentions. Here are seven lies we commonly tell ourselves to indulge or to hide the truth from ourselves. To live our best lives, it is essential to recognize these self-sabotage patterns and evict them to make more empowering choices.
I wish I could do _______, but I can’t.
‘I can’t’ almost always means ‘I don’t want to.’ We hide behind ‘I can’t’ to pretend the choice isn’t really ours. In the short run, it may feel beneficial because we can avoid owning our preferences and pretend that we have no choice in the matter. But it comes at a significant cost! By habitually hiding behind ‘I can’t’ we disempower ourselves across all areas of our lives. What we really need to say is ‘I don’t want to’ instead of ‘I can’t.’ It is more honest and restores our sense of personal power and choice.
I deserve this dessert….
Or this dress… or this outcome… or… whatever. This is one I hear often! Lying to ourselves by pretending that we deserve what we lust for, lets us indulge in momentary comforts. The problem is, once the momentary gratification wears off, we’re back to facing the original, unpleasant feelings. I have seen people overeat by saying they deserve to indulge after a long day at a job they hate or working with people they loathe. They use food as a reward even though it wrecks their health; and this is the epitome of self-sabotage cloaked in righteous garb. Nobody deserves to wake up feeling awful about their choices. By addressing core issues, every person has the power to restore a sense of well-being to life.
Another related, insidious phrase that people use is ‘I need,’ as in, ‘I need that new dress’ or ‘I need you to listen to me.’ If you’re alive and surviving without it right now, then you clearly don’t need it. This habit may sound insignificant, but it is dishonest. Changing ‘I need’ to ‘I want’ is incredibly freeing. Whereas ‘I need’ sets you up to believe you’ll be hurt if you don’t get something, ‘I want’ gives you freedom.”
I’m definitely right.
This is one of the most damaging lies we can tell ourselves, according to social psychologist Carol Tavris, Ph.D., coauthor of Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me): Why We Justify Foolish Beliefs, Bad Decisions, and Hurtful Acts. It’s called the basic bias—the idea that everyone else is biased, but we’re not. The belief that you know best and that you’ve got all the facts prevents you from even listening to evidence that you’re wrong—that your memory may be wrong, your perception inaccurate or your explanation faulty. It’s inherently self-damaging because it keeps you stuck in the limitations of what you think you know. It also makes you a miserable person to be with, so watch for this lie!
I have no willpower.
You do have some willpower. We all do, even though laboratory tests have shown that willpower is finite – after people used self-control for some tasks, they had less of it for subsequent tasks (that’s why it’s not a good idea to quit smoking, start a stressful job, and go on a diet on the same day!) Researchers have found that willpower, like a muscle, can be built up over time through regular training. Moreover, it has spillover benefits: If you decided to straighten your posture every time you thought about it for two weeks, you will not only improve your posture, but you’ll also experience all-around improvement in self-empowerment in completely unrelated areas!
I’ll never get over it.
In The Emotional Life Of Your Brain, author and neuroscientist Richard J. Davidson states that we’re not necessarily conscious of just how rapidly we recover from adversity. You’ve probably heard of psychologist Dan Gilbert’s research showing how people who’ve been paralyzed are about as happy a year after the accident as they were before; likewise, lottery winners were found to be no happier a year after their big win.
By allowing yourself to simply feel the negative emotions of major setbacks and trusting nature’s ability to heal, you’ll discover that negative emotions actually have a finite lifespan and tend to abate over time. While there is substantial variability in how long each person may need to grieve their losses, it is a good rule of thumb to start looking for some sense of forward motion after about six months. If not, you may benefit from professional help.
Researchers have found that people who are slower to recover from stressful events in fact have brains that are wired differently. Fortunately, we can change our brains activity patterns with mindfulness meditation, which boosts activity in the pre-frontal cortex. Studies have shown how this practice over time weakens the negative chain of associations that keep us obsessing about setbacks.
I don’t judge others.
Sure, you do! Research into how humans categorize and perceive others, shows that we all make spontaneous trait inferences about others within less than a second after meeting them! These findings are remarkably consistent across the globe, as people instantly judge each other on two main qualities: warmth and competence. People who are judged as competent but cold (such as a wealthy tycoon) elicit envy or hostility. People who are perceived as warm but incompetent (such as elderly people) bring out feelings of pity. Here’s the kicker: all judgment is ultimately self-judgment. When we size people up, we’re judging them with our conscious mind – and we are ultimately judging ourselves because we’re trying to figure out how we fit in.
If only I had a million dollars, I’d fulfill my dream of _____.
This little self-deluding bomb? It’s disproved every time we see an attorney who aspires to own a restaurant and goes to cooking school at night, or a mom who build an Etsy business while her kids take their afternoon nap. Somehow, we are so certain — so absolutely certain — that we can’t take the leap without a certain financial guarantee or windfall. We totally delude and block ourselves with this lie! Instead, why not take a step closer to your dreams from where you are at right now, and make the commitment to gradually transition to what you really want to do with the rest of your life. It is only too late if you don’t start now!
by Ada Porat | Nov 14, 2016 | Change bad habits, Conscious living, Environment, Mindfulness, Peace
For eons, people have been struggling with the concept of time. It permeates our language and influences our outlook on life. After all, time is money, time is of the essence and time flies, right!
And so, we struggle for control over time: we measure time, stretch time, lose time, kill time, and still never have enough time! It’s not surprising we feel this way. The pace of life today is far more frenetic than it was even just a generation ago.
In the struggle to control time, we’ve grown so out of touch with the natural world that it doesn’t seem to matter whether it’s day or night, hot or cold, summer or winter. We control the climate at home, in the car and at the office. We create artificial environments to extend our days. We eat food with little regard for its season or source.
These artificial life choices further separate us from the rhythms and cycles of nature, desensitizing us to nature’s seasonal indicators of passing time. When we stare into the cold screens of our electronic gadgets, we disconnect from the natural world around us and forget our origins.
In the words of author Michael McCarthy, “We need constant reminding that we have only been operators of computers for a single generation… but we were farmers for 500 generations, and before that hunter-gatherers for perhaps 50,000 or more, living with the natural world as part of it as we evolved.”
If we want inner peace, we need to learn how to coexist peacefully with the inevitable march of time instead of trying to control it. We need to synchronize with time at all levels. The sixteenth-century Chinese poet Liu Wenmin put it this way:
“To be able to be unhurried when hurried;
To be able not to slack off when relaxed;
To be able not to be frightened
And at a loss for what to do,
When frightened and at a loss;
This is the learning that returns us
To our natural state and transforms our lives.”
Time moves on whether we are hurtling through life or savoring it. We can – indeed we must – learn to remain still and calm amid the torrent of commitments, not allowing our overscheduled lives to rob us of the time we need to recalibrate and connect to the natural world, ourselves, and each other.
The simple act of spending time in nature is one such solution that has many healing properties. In Japan, this healing process is known as “shinrin-yoku” or forest bathing. Scientific studies confirm that spending time in nature can lead to decreased stress hormone production, lower heart rate and blood pressure, elevate mood and strengthen the immune system.
If you’ve ever had the opportunity to return to the same place season after season, you’d recall the private pleasure of reconnecting to a special place each time you returned: becoming aware of the height of the tide, the direction of the wind, the time of sunrise and sunset, and the phase of the moon. Having a place in nature to return to allows us to reconnect where we’d left off, much like picking up an old friendship.
Sometimes we encounter the power and beauty of the natural world in one startling moment: observing the grandeur of a rainbow after a storm, or seeing the beauty of some tiny creature up close. These are magical moments when all sense of time stops and we’re caught up in the wonder of the present moment.
To connect to nature is to reconnect to our own origins. Stepping out of our man-made schedules and obligations – even if just for a few moments – to look at the clouds, smell the air, feel the breeze on our skin, helps us reconnect to the eternal nature of creation and find peace.
About the author
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
by Ada Porat | Mar 9, 2016 | Change bad habits, Conscious living, Fear and anxiety, Mindfulness
Emotional pain can traumatize us long after the event that triggered it. The more traumatizing the event, the more we tend to revisit memories, thereby keeping the pain alive.
We do this not because we wish to suffer, but because we simply don’t realize the power of our thoughts. We don’t recognize that it is not the traumatic event, but our thinking about that event, that continues to perpetuate the pain.
The mind does not know the difference between actual events and thoughts about them. To the mind, thoughts are as real as the events they represent, and so we keep reliving the painful trauma of past events as long as we replay these thoughts in our minds.
Breaking free from this cycle requires that we recognize the process and choose different responses to it. As soon as we stop giving our life energy to memories that seem to be overpowering, those memories lose their illusion of power. In the very moment of choosing differently, we are also released from the ongoing emotional pain of suffering over what had happened to us in the past.
Negative memories do not have an individual, independent existence. When we falsely believe that what happened in the past still has power over us, we allow ourselves to revisit the tyranny of emotional pain triggered by those past memories. It really serves no purpose now!
Think about it for a moment: in order for the person who broke up with you to still be able to hurt you now, in this moment, they need to be breaking up with you now, at this very moment. In reality, the event has passed and is no longer taking place in your present reality – yet you continue to suffer because you are replaying the details of the event in your mind, allowing the memories to trigger emotional pain each time you think about it!
Nothing, absolutely nothing can have power over us unless we give it that power. When we truly understand this principle, we can begin to free ourselves from the emotional pain of negative memories.
Instead of seeing ourselves as victims of circumstances beyond our control, we can exercise our innate power to choose what we focus on. And whatever we choose to focus on, becomes our reality.
Our perception produces what we experience. This perception is made up of many different elements, all of which are based on our subjective interpretation of reality – not the objective reality. When we view events this way, we relate to life through these subjective filters of attachment, desire, lack or fear.
These subjective filters of perception form our viewpoint of any given experience and then flavor our interpretation with emotion. It is not the relationship breakup that causes our current pain, then, but the painful meaning we attached to that memory. Our perception labeled the event as “heart-breaking” or as our “one and only chance at love” or as a “vicious betrayal.”
In reality, the event itself was simply part of the ongoing unfolding of life – it was neither good nor bad. It’s our interpretation of the event that creates the joy or emotional pain we associate with it.
If our perception causes pain, then why don’t we just let events happen spontaneously without grabbing onto them and interpreting their ‘meaning’ from our particular viewpoint? Why do we choose to continue experiencing the emotional pain?
I believe we interpret events through the filters of our perception because we’ve become so used to drama and trauma, pain and suffering that we are not sure who we are without it. As strange as it may seem, we welcome the habitual demons of emotional pain because it makes us feel alive.
But this is not our true nature. It’s always the false self – the ego – that thrives on the drama of emotional pain. At the same time, you and I are not just egos; we are spiritual beings who live in human form with the ego as our constant companion.
We can free ourselves from the false suffering of ongoing emotional pain to embrace a higher way of life! The perception of pain as evidence of being alive does not come from the soul; it stems from the ego’s attempts to resist change and maintain the status quo at all costs. All these conditions that seemed so real and painful are the creation of faulty perception as directed by the ego!
It is our misguided belief that past events have the power to hurt us that makes them continue to appear hurtful and propagates the emotional pain. Once we choose to remove our focus from the events, the energy around the memories collapses and we can move on.
We can accelerate this process by bringing fresh logic to the situation. Everything that is created has both a beginning and an end; therefore, everything we experience over the course of life, eventually passes to make room for new events and experiences. And so, even the most painful events of our lives also pass with time. We can help this process along by becoming mindful of what we focus on and staying present in each moment.
Even if we’ve suffered for years because of the way our perception interpreted what happened to us, we no longer need to suffer this pain. Now that we understand how the process works, we no longer need to be a victim of our own misunderstanding. We can inwardly say to that suffering ego state,
“Ego, you are not the ruling power in my life – you only think you are. The knots in my life that have me all tied up have no power over me outside of my own perception. It is ego’s perception that led me to interpret these events as emotional pain, but now I choose to see things as they really are.”
Then we can turn our focus away from the ego’s habitual re-runs of past traumas. We can let go of the emotional pain. Instead, we can turn toward Truth within to reclaim our peace in this present moment.
When we release the past, we become free at last to embrace our birthright of peace in this present moment.
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
by Ada Porat | Jan 27, 2016 | Conscious living, Gratitude, Mindfulness
One of the most common yearnings expressed by individuals in the West, is the desire for happiness. The founding fathers of the United States declared that the American people have the right to life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. And pursue it we have!
Hollywood advocates that that we will find happiness when we are rich enough, find true love, or encounter some magical event. We are conditioned to look for happiness somewhere else: in the future, in someone else, or in some outside situation.
Question is: how well has it served us?
When we look at the sky-rocketing levels of addiction, breakup, depression and unhappiness that run rampant in this society despite it being one of the most affluent in the world, it is clear that chasing after happiness outside ourselves, does not work.
You see, happiness is not out there; it is an inside job. And that means that you and I have the power to be happy right now, right where we are. If we are unhappy, perhaps it is time to take a look at the nature of happiness so we can stop dreaming about it and take practical steps to become happier. Yes, happiness is not something we stumble upon; it is something we create, something we become.
Researchers have found that we do not need to always get what we want in order to be happy. We can be just as happy if we don’t get what we want, as we’d be if we do actually get what we want.
In fact, we can manufacture our own happiness – and if we desire happiness, it is essential that we learn how to do this.
Researchers distinguish between two kinds of happiness: natural and synthetic happiness. Researcher Dan Gilbert defines them this way: “Natural happiness is what we get when we get what we wanted, and synthetic happiness is what we make when we don’t get what we wanted.”
Natural or spontaneous happiness is what we experience when things are going our way and fortune smiles on us. This is the kind we are most familiar with, but it is also fleeting, unreliable and intermittent.
Synthesized or manufactured happiness is the kind of happiness we create when we change the way we look at things; the happiness we synthesize when we learn to make lemonade from the lemons in our lives, and it is every bit as real as spontaneous happiness.
In fact, when we fixate on finding spontaneous happiness, we miss the opportunity to manufacture happiness with what is already in our lives, and we become miserable!
A good example would be looking at how the two types of happiness interact in relationship. In dating, we look to find what we want; in marriage, we need to find a way to like what we’ve gotten!
New relationships are marked by spontaneous happiness; whereas the challenge of marriage is to learn how to synthesize happiness with the person and situation we have chosen. Chasing after the next fleeting experience of spontaneous happiness won’t last; it is the process of manufacturing happiness within the constraints of our situation that brings lasting fulfillment and joy. Ironically, this process of synthesizing happiness works best when we are totally stuck or trapped!
Synthetic happiness acts like our psychological immune system. It works to keep us happy. In his book, Stumbling upon Happiness, author Dan Gilbert describes it as a system of cognitive processes, largely non-conscious, that help us change our views of situations so we can feel better about the situations we find ourselves in.
Author Wayne Dyer put it another way when he said, “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at, change.”
Our brains are notoriously bad at predicting our happiness. Experiments have repeatedly shown that we overestimate both anticipated pleasure and pain. Our prefrontal cortex simulates that getting something we want, is more important than it really is – it exaggerates the impact of events on our happiness, whether positive or negative.
For example, we overestimate that winning the lottery will increase our happiness or that losing the use of financial security or becoming a paraplegic will completely ruin us. In reality, individuals test at similar levels of happiness one year after winning lottery or becoming a paraplegic. In other words, both our desires and worries are overblown.
We can manufacture our own happiness from within – right now, with where we are and what we have. When we learn to synthesize happiness from within, the very events and outcomes we dread, can turn into new opportunities for happiness.
Studies further indicate that freedom and choice can negatively impact our happiness. When we have choices, we worry about opportunities lost. Think about that the next time you are in the grocery aisle trying to select a product!
Freedom is the enemy of synthetic happiness. While freedom can bring about spontaneous happiness when it offers what we want, it robs us of the opportunity to synthesize happiness. You see, we only learn to like what we have when we have no choice! It is when we are feeling stuck that we have the opportunity to create happiness from within by learning to appreciate what we do have.
Most of us tend to have a basic level of happiness that we revert to. Not everybody ascribes to the “bullying cheerfulness” of false happiness, as physician Andrew Weil describes the prevalent cult of happiness in America.
In his book, Spontaneous Happiness, Weil says that there is an inverse relationship between affluence and contentment: The more we have, the less contented we seem to be. In America, the cultural expectation that we’re to be happy all the time and our children should be happy all the time is toxic, and it gets in the way of true emotional well-being.
Mahatma Ghandi perhaps put it best when he said: “Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.”
Genuine happiness comes from within, and is synthesized by a lifestyle that integrates personal values, gratitude, laughter and forgiveness. In the long run, these qualities allow us to synthesize happiness as an enduring form of contentment and serenity, independent of external circumstance.
About the author
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
by Ada Porat | Sep 23, 2015 | Abundance, Conscious living, Cope with change, Gratitude, Life transitions, Mindfulness, Self-awareness, Spirituality
Ask anyone in the Western world how they define abundance, and you are likely to hear them talk about material riches and prosperity. And yet, true abundance is so much more!
The definition of an abundant life cannot be satisfied by the presence of material things alone. Jesus knew this when he said that man shall not live by bread alone, but by the living Word or Spirit. He challenged the common assumptions of his time by pointing out that true abundance cannot be confined to merely physical terms.
The common, limited assumption of abundance as a merely physical notion prevails even today. To find lasting fulfillment in life, it is essential for us to question and redefine such limiting social beliefs. We need to understand that true abundance applies at the levels of body, mind and spirit.
In my work, I am blessed to see the power of questioning assumptions every day. Once we become aware of limiting beliefs and behaviors, we can change them. Along the way, we learn to look deeper instead of blindly repeating the same old habits to getting the same old outcomes. By identifying the hidden determinants of our behavior, our lives often shift spontaneously!
One of the primary areas where limitation shows up is in our relationship to abundance – or its opposite, scarcity. In an era of unprecedented abundance in the western world, many still struggle with feeling that there is not enough: not enough to feel complete, not enough to feel safe or secure. We keep accumulating material things that cannot fill the deep emptiness inside our souls.
During feudal times, all wealth was tied to land ownership and material prosperity was a zero-sum game. Abundance was defined by material belongings because there was only so much land, and only so many people could own it. Land owners could build fortresses and tax travelers passing across their property, leading to more wealth. This system led to separation between those who owned land and those who didn’t, the haves and the have-nots.
This belief system is still active as a powerful undercurrent in modern society. With each economic cycle, millions of individuals over-extend themselves to acquire physical assets and wealth during economic booms, only to find their fortunes evaporate when the boom turns into a bust. In some societies, cycles of war and civil unrest strip people of all forms of physical security they may have painstakingly amassed over generations.
But does the loss of physical assets really make you a loser? And does the presence of physical assets alone define you as a winner?
Enlightened teachers like Jesus and the Buddha taught that true abundance is not based on physical assets alone. They proposed that true abundance includes qualities such as integrity, honesty, service, and loving kindness to all forms of life. These teachings pointed to a higher and necessary concept of abundance that still eludes general consensus today.
Talk to people around you and you’ll find many adhering to the outdated belief of measuring abundance by material displays of wealth. Besides that, you’ll find the limiting notion of having to compete against others to secure these limited resources for survival.
Western society is predicated on this outdated assumption that there’s only so much to go around, and that we need to compete with others for these resources on a basis of win/lose. I have to get mine first before you can get yours or the limited supply runs out (think black Friday shopping mobs!)… if you win, I will lose… and on we go, pitting our limiting beliefs against others in an effort to survive. We expand scarcity consciousness to every facet of life: believing that for my faith to be right, yours has to be wrong; for my political party to win, I have to sling mud and make yours look bad; and so on.
If I believe you must lose in order for me to win, or that you must be shamed so I can have value, or that you must be wrong for me to be vindicated, or you must be suppressed for me to feel free, then my sense of happiness becomes dependent on your lack thereof. My experience of life becomes fragmented into opposites, and I end up suffering estrangement from my fellow humans and my true nature. A life lived from such outdated beliefs offers very limited love, serenity and security.
Many forms of duality-based limitations such as these cause untold suffering in the world. Turn to the news and you will find numerous examples of this scarcity-based thinking in us versus them propaganda, xenophobia, social upheaval and marginalization that pervades society.
The Buddha taught his disciples to free themselves from the vice of duality-thinking; to liberate themselves from the opposites of desire and aversion which propel the cycles of scarcity and suffering. It is only when we let go of this misguided struggle for a bit of material security at the cost of happiness, that we are able to poise our minds in peace.
How do we uncouple from the vicious cycle of chasing after material security and finding scarcity instead?
The power lies in our thoughts. Our thoughts contain the seed forms of potential; making change possible in our consciousness, our belief systems and our world.
Physical reality manifests from our imagination and ideas about how things are. As humans, we are gifted with the ability to change the way we think, and hence create different outcomes. We can change the way we look at things and thereby change the outcomes!
Instead of seeing the world as a physical pie and ourselves competing against others for a slice of it, we can consciously change our view. Perhaps it is time to recognize that energy is never destroyed; it simply changes form. We can expand our definition of true abundance to include all its myriad forms: the material as well as the mental, emotional, psychological and spiritual. And perhaps we need to acknowledge that there is enough for all of us, and then share our resources from that perspective.
Changing old mindsets for more appropriate ones may not be as clean or predictable as we’d like. Evolution is messy and uncertain. A clear outcome is not always apparent. To the minds of westerners who like control, reliability and certainty, this can be nerve-wracking. Yet, the alternative is to allow greed to destroy balance in our world and to render humanity extinct.
Times of change call us to trust on a grand level. We need to trust in our Source, ourselves and each other as we redefine true abundance. When we do so, times of upheaval can give birth to new paradigms that better fit our needs.
About the author
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
