How to Stay Strong When Things Go Wrong

How to Stay Strong When Things Go Wrong

Do you wish you could stay strong when setbacks hit and things go wrong? If so, you’re not alone! Setbacks and disappointments are a part of life, but learning how to effectively deal with them, can help to strengthen us from within.

When faced with setbacks, disappointments and stagnation, the first thing to do is not to fight back harder, but to step back and regain perspective before proceeding. This may feel counterproductive at first, but it is vitally important.

When we get so focused that we see things as black and white, good or bad, we can get boxed into rigidity. Truth is, life consist of an entire spectrum of possibilities, rather than just two choices. Stepping back and refocusing opens our minds to more ways of seeing and acting in life.

It does not always require a major shift; even a small tweak can make a difference. Just step back and shift your perspective enough to include one more way of looking at that situation. Is it really true that you are the only actor responsible for creating a desired outcome? It may be more accurate to say you represent one of many conditions that need to come together for something to unfold.

Even when we put our best into something, the outcome might not be what we expected. There may be very strong messages from inside and around us telling us that the outcome is the most important thing, yet that is a limited perspective. The outcome is less important than cultivating our capacity to be with whatever is, even when it is not at all what we have wished for.

This means learning to be okay with not knowing, with not being able to control the outcome. We continue to practice and train our ability to at peace within, and we don’t take the outcome personally.

This is at the heart of authentic spiritual work: it includes both being and doing; awareness as well as the discipline of application. What keeps us pliable in this often challenging process, is the attitude of gratitude.

Gratitude is not dependent on external circumstances. We don’t feel gratitude just because everything is going great, although that’s important to acknowledge. We especially need to practice gratitude when things are not going the way we want them to. It’s when things go wrong, that we are faced with deeper attachments and desires that often masquerade as needs.

To stay flexible, we need to practice gratitude anyhow; similar to the concept of “hallelujah anyhow” that is often heard in black churches; giving thanks and finding gratitude not because of our circumstances, but despite them.

The challenge is to stay in a receptive, open place, not fighting against what’s happening, but digging deeper within to live from our core values, to be the difference we wish to see in the world, and to lead by example in making a difference despite the setbacks we may face. It requires us to dig deep and keep showing up, doing our best with the resources and gifts that we ourselves have been given to make this world a better place.

And when our best is not sufficient to change things around yet, we entrust the outcomes to a Higher hand and we stay the course with compassion for ourselves and others. Once conditions are appropriate, the outcomes will be sure. In the meantime, the work remains because living from our true core and purpose is the only meaningful way to live. Even when conditions are not yet appropriate for optimal outcomes to show up, we can say “hallelujah” anyhow, and stay the course.

Setbacks and delays are part of life’s reality, and they are fully workable. Our practice is to not pull away from the dissonance, not to withdraw from what we are faced with; and in that place where commitment and discipline meet the obstacles, our souls learn resilience and strength.

This is true especially when you feel outnumbered and alone. Don’t get locked into the duality of blame and shame! You cannot be successful by feeding what you are fighting, so when you reach this point, step back and regroup!

Do something good instead. Recognize that we need the shadow to show us the light, and navigate by forgiving the limitations of the shadow and finding a way to shine the light.

One of the biggest pitfalls in our society is the way in which personal preferences are mislabeled as needs. People often attempt to manipulate others by presenting their emotional preferences as needs, and then demanding these “needs” be met. Listen to individuals for a day and you’ll notice how often this is used to manipulate: “I need you to be quiet now,” “I need you to listen to me,” “I need you to do this right now,” and the list goes on.

In reality, these statements confuse emotional preferences with needs. They are indicative of misappropriate use of the limbic brain, where needs and preferences are often confused in early childhood. Adults who get stuck in this dysfunctional behavior, create a lot of chaos for themselves and others.

An emotional “need” is not the same as the biological need for oxygen, food and shelter; it is simply a preference. In fact, psychologist Steven Stosny identifies only one valid emotional need for adults, and that is to act consistently on deeper values.

When we consistently act from our deeper values, all the emotional preferences that parade as important needs, will either be satisfied as a byproduct of meaningful living, or they will drop away as unimportant in the bigger lens of living a purposeful life.

The best way to attain the life you want to have, is to approach it from the perspective of living it in alignment with your deeper values and meaning, not from emotional preferences masquerading as “needs.”

When you do that, you will find your roots digging deeper so you can stay strong when things go wrong.

About The Author:

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

How to Restore Passion For Your Life

How to Restore Passion For Your Life

When was the last time you felt truly passionate about something? Felt good, right? And so it should! Good thing is, you can learn how to restore passion for your life.

Passion is most evident when body, mind and spirit work together to create, articulate or manifest feelings, ideas and values. Passion is ignited when all of you work together. It is the presence of your soul combined with the totality of all you’ve experienced, and it empowers to live at optimal levels.

Passion your natural state. When what you do is in alignment with who you are, it increases your energy. Passion is like water flowing along its natural riverbed, gaining momentum from its course – unlike many work environments, where it feels more like trying to force water up and over a mountain!

Passion creates resilience. It enables you to overcome obstacles and to look beyond current setbacks to the infinite potential that’s yours to claim. The passionate soul discovers nuggets of potential in every situation.

Passion transfers vibrant energy to every person or situation it touches. You can’t fake it. Anyone can spot a phony by sensing lack of authenticity and depth in their actions.

And yet, many people run from passion because they’re afraid of being burned. They hang on to the pain of betrayed trust and misplaced confidences as a reminder to dampen their own passion, lest they be hurt again. Perhaps they held the bucket for soulless greed and overzealous egos disguised as passion. Consequently, they’re afraid of taking the risk to live life fully, openly and passionately. They may have even vowed to never go there again.

Instead, they opt for a more predictable, monochromatic existence. Rather than taking exploring the endless possibilities of life, they insist on hiding inside a safety bubble; giving up on adventure to exist in a sanitary, colorless world where nothing new happens.

What they really need is a return to passion!

If you want a juicy life, you need to open your heart and mind to the multidimensional experience of passionate living every day.

Can you imagine how much more meaningful our roles as parents, lovers, business owners, employees, teachers and leaders would be if all our actions were predicated on our true passion? There is no limit to how far your influence can reach! To tap into your potential, you must engage life with passion. By bringing passion to what you do, you express every aspect of your creative being.

Here’s the secret to living a passionate life: Never try to throttle down your passion for fear of what might show up! You cannot selectively suppress some part of your being without also suppressing the rest of your energy. When you suppress your passion, you also suppress your Life Force.

Truth is, every activity you engage in expresses the whole of you – much like one part of a hologram reflects the whole in its entirety. Even if you pick a narrow skill like running a marathon or cooking, your whole sense of self is expressed through that activity when doing it with passion.

When living from your passion, you bring your entire identity to the party, not just an isolated part. This may sound daunting, but actually it’s the most natural way to approach anything.

When you hold some part of yourself back, you deny it exposure to life; you repress its energy and keep it from learning what it needs to know. Imagine a baby who wants to learn how to walk but has these reservations:

  • I don’t want to look bad.
  • I don’t want to fall down.
  • I don’t want to fail.
  • I don’t want to expend all my energy.
  • I don’t want any pain.
  • I don’t want to suffer.

It would seem absurd! If these thoughts prevail, the chance for mastery could never present itself. Yet as adults we resort to such reservations all the time – and deny ourselves mastery as a result.

The minute a situation arises, all the negatives around that situation will arise in the mind along with all the possibilities. The key is that you have a choice about which to focus on!

When you choose to focus on negatives, you yield to subconscious fear to shut out understanding. Do that often enough and you become a victim, subject to bewildering fears that can threaten to overwhelm you. These fears aren’t coming from blind fate or misfortune; they simply represent holes in your awareness, the places where you haven’t dared to look yet.

To break free from such self-limiting behavior, try looking at an issue that has kept you from totally engaging in life. For instance, if you are worried about what others may think of your effort, then that is the issue you need to challenge!

When I launched out into a solo practice, well-intended friends questioned whether I would make it in a highly demanding field. I chose not to listen to the voices of apprehension; instead, I redoubled my efforts because my passion is to help people.

At the time, it was the scariest, riskiest, most challenging thing I could think of doing with my life. It was also the one thing that kept me dreaming and working against all odds. Today, I can look back at decades of amazing outcomes and success.

Choosing to follow my passion took me to the edge of my comfort zone and stretched me in every way possible. It also brought growth, joy and fulfillment into every area of my life. I wouldn’t trade what I’m doing for the world, because I get to use my innate gifts daily. I love living in alignment with my purpose and my passion!

What is that one, wild dream you have buried deep within? Is it time to let it emerge into the light where you can nourish it into a passionate path to fulfillment? How will you know unless you try?

You can restore passion for your life!

Start voicing your inner dreams and passions. Face down your fears, and treat your dreams like tender threads of gold, for they are every bit as precious. They form the fabric that fabulous lives are woven from!

About The Author:

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

How To Recover From Setbacks In Ten Proven Steps

How To Recover From Setbacks In Ten Proven Steps

Disasters and upheaval happen in every life. Wouldn’t it be nice to be able to recover from setbacks faster?

You may have been spared the trauma of earthquakes, random violence or war… only to face work layoffs, escalating debt, or a devastating medical diagnosis. Perhaps you feel stuck working at a job you hate but can’t leave because of current market conditions, or you don’t know how to change a seriously dysfunctional relationship.

When setbacks hit, it is common to feel overwhelmed, helpless and scared. In fact, others may tell you that you are overreacting; things are not all that bad.

If that is true, why do you feel so bad? The current setback in your life may have triggered an avalanche of past trauma memories or flashbacks, evoking deep emotional trauma for you.

Your ability to bounce back from setbacks depends on many factors, including your natural resilience or ability to cope with stress, the severity of the trauma, and what types of support you have access to.

When setbacks leave you feeling disempowered and vulnerable, it may be tempting to self-medicate with alcohol or drugs. These substances may temporarily soothe you, but they make things worse in the long run. Substance abuse worsens many symptoms of trauma. It also leads to emotional numbing, social isolation, anger and depression. Ultimately, such forms of self-medication interfere with treatment and can add to problems at home and in relationships.

As news of disturbing events continue to unfold worldwide, it is more important than ever to sharpen your coping skills at physical, emotional and spiritual levels. It is up to you to put together your own disaster-preparation kit, so that you can be resilient in navigating the winds of change! Here are some positive coping strategies to help you get through times of stress and upheaval:

1. Recognize that you may be grieving. Grief is a natural part of the life cycle that follows loss. You may find yourself cycling back and forth through the five major stages of grief: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Cycling through the stages of grief is normal – you are not losing your grip on reality. Allow yourself to grieve for the parts of life that you have lost, and take comfort in knowing that this process will come to completion in due time.

2. Honor your losses. Loss can show up in many ways. You may have lost your job, a relationship, a loved one, friends, pets, your home, possessions, your dreams, health, or your quality of life. Try writing about your loss or create a ritual to express your sense of loss. Rather than expecting to just “get over it” and move on with your life, take time to honor and affirm your losses – it is a valuable part of the healing process.

3. Talk to someone for support. During setbacks, it is important not to isolate yourself. Instead, make an effort to be with supportive people that you have carefully identified as safe. Face the challenges in your life and identify the most important problems. Then get help from safe friends, family members or professionals to help you address these so you can move past them.

4. Find your new normal. When life as you knew it ends, you may feel as if your entire infrastructure has collapsed, and previous guidelines lose meaning. You may find your emotions swinging from one extreme to another, temporarily losing your sense of what’s normal. When your personal world falls apart, it is important to remember that you are not alone, weak, or crazy. It helps to know your problems are shared by many others who have experienced – and survived – similar setbacks.

5. Break things into manageable chunks. When feeling too scattered to focus, recognize that your mind is trying to cope with your situation the best it can. Instead of berating yourself, take positive steps to regroup. Slow down. Give yourself time to focus on what you need to learn or do. Write things down and make “To Do” lists. Break tasks down into smaller, manageable chunks. Set just one realistic goal or task for each day. And get help if you need it.

6. Take time out when angry. The stress that accompanies major setbacks can create irritability and anger. This can affect your self-control, health and relationships. Anger can increase your heart rate so much that you cannot think clearly. Remember that staying angry doesn’t work. It actually increases stress and can cause health problems. Burn your anger off in the gym or get professional help to learn how to manage it more effectively.

7. Reconnect to positive emotions. After a major setback, many people have trouble feeling or expressing positive emotions. They may even feel guilty for surviving. This is a common reaction to trauma. It is not helpful to feel guilty for something you did not want to happen and cannot control. Instead, shift your focus to gratitude for surviving and resolve to make your life count!

8. Exercise positive thinking. Monitor your thoughts. If they cause you to feel stuck or helpless, switch to more helpful thoughts. For example, if you find yourself thinking, “I can’t do it,” challenge yourself with questions such as: “Is it really true that I can’t do it?” “Is it always true?” “Under what circumstances could I do it?” “What could help me do it?” Then select a more helpful train of thought that builds confidence. In this case, you might say to yourself, “With the right help, I can get through this.”

9. Take time to relax. Consciously choose to focus on something positive to help you relax. Some helpful activities include mental calming with progressive relaxation, mindfulness meditation, or conscious breathing; physical exercise such as swimming, walking or yoga; spiritual activities such as prayer, chanting or singing; and other healing activities such as listening to quiet music, spending time with pets or being in nature.

10. Reach out to help others. Helping others in need or volunteering in your community can be powerful ways for you to heal. It relieves stress by taking your mind off your own problems for awhile, and helps you see them in a different light. Providing support for others can also make you feel more connected and empowered.

Together, these guidelines can help you bounce back from life’s setbacks stronger and wiser!

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

Restoring Alignment: The Core of Personal Growth

Restoring Alignment: The Core of Personal Growth

Too much change, too fast, becomes counterproductive. It can feel overwhelming because it pulls us out of alignment with our habits, beliefs and values without giving us enough time to adapt.

If you’ve slipped into overwhelm, it’s most likely not because you’re a loser but because you are stuck in situations that have pulled you out of alignment with your inner truth. Restoring alignment and flow in life is at the core of all personal growth.

To regain harmony, you need to restore a greater sense of alignment between your external environment and your inner self. This restoration work has two parts: changing your outer environment and changing your inner relationship to your outer environment.

To restore alignment with your outer environment, you may need to let go of friends who drag you back into old habits or step out of a destructive relationship at work or home.

The second part requires changing your internal relationship to your outer environment. This alignment is more important because you have complete power over your internal choices, whereas you have less influence over your outer environment.

Changing your internal relationship with your environment takes a lot of effort – there are no short cuts to glory here. The payoff – increased peace, harmony, joy, energy, clarity, self-respect, empowerment, satisfaction and meaning in life – is its own reward!

Here are some critical components that can help you restore alignment with your environment.

  1. Refocus

Refocus on your core values. As you do this, an inner sense of integrity will return to your life. When there are no discrepancies in your value system, decisionmaking becomes easier, so you can align with environments that support your being instead of suppressing you.

  1. Define Your Purpose

You are the only person who can define what your life needs to look like to have meaning and success. For a moment, imagine you are at the end of your life, reviewing the life you’ve just lived. What’s the single most important accomplishment in your life? What is it you wish to be remembered for? What is the legacy you leave behind? When you connect with that core purpose, it will bring focus to everything else you do.

  1. Look for Clarity

Next, what things in life bring you joy? Even if you can think of just one thing, reflect on it until you see why it brings you joy. Is it playing with your dog because it makes you feel unconditionally loved; or spending time nurturing family members where you feel that you are making a valuable contribution? Identify what brings you joy and why; then start looking for ways to bring more of that into your life. With clarity around what brings joy and meaning to your life, you’ll enjoy the effort of working toward it, instead of feeling burdened.

  1. Cultivate Awareness

Observe animals in the wild and you’ll notice how fully present they are in each moment. For them, it’s a matter of life or death. For you and me, the process ultimately leads to the same outcomes although we’re not always aware of it. Each waking moment, we make choices that either move us toward a fuller expression of life or deaden the Life Force in us. Cultivate full awareness and you’ll make more optimal choices.

  1. Stay present

Stay present in the moment; discipline your mind and bring it back from a hypothetical future fraught with fear (“What if I lose my job?” or “What if I get cancer?”) Fact is, the future is not created yet and by letting fear-filled thoughts run rampant in your mind, you’re setting in motion probabilities that won’t serve you well! Likewise, ruminating about yesterday serves no purpose other than distracting your focus and draining your energy. At the end of each day, review the events of the day; forgive those who’ve hurt or let you down; ask forgiveness for those areas where you didn’t live up to your highest potential; resolve how you’re going to make different choices; and then let them go! Stay present – this is the only place from where you can bring about meaningful change.

  1. Be resourceful

When faced with challenges, don’t limit your options. Choose different responses; find more than one way of looking at things. Broaden your viewpoint to include possibilities you may not have entertained before. Consider all options you can think of before narrowing down your choices. You’d be amazed at how this simple exercise opens up possibilities!

  1. Banish self-judgment and negative self-talk

When you indulge in self-judgment and negative self-talk, you’re replaying the old tapes of others’ criticism and judgment that you’ve internalized. These behaviors are self-destructive. Stop it! You wouldn’t dream of attacking the Divine Presence in you, so why would you attack the human aspects that need healing? Healthy introspection acknowledges limitation and failure without judgment and allows you to change behaviors that no longer serve you.

  1. Maintain respect

If your actions were made public, would you retain self-respect? Societal norms commonly condone acts of greed and dishonesty as long as the perpetrator doesn’t get caught. Tolerating such lack of integrity undermines respect for ourselves and others. Do only that which you’d respect in another, and that which you wouldn’t mind being made public. When you maintain respect, you are strengthening the foundations of your life and your society.

  1. Stay in the Game

The game of life is not over until the final breath. Don’t give up at half-time because you’ve fumbled the ball. Never let one bad move knock you out of commission – get back in and give it your best! Change the things that don’t work and focus on what does. Give thanks for the breaks along the way and keep at it until the final moment! Miracles and breakthroughs often come at the most unexpected times, but you must be in the game to benefit from it.

Working with even just a few of these aspects will help you restore a sense of alignment between your inner life and your external environment so you can be the difference our world needs now!

About the Author:

©Copyright Ada Porat. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

A Vibrant Inner Life: The Secret to Resilience in a Changing World

A Vibrant Inner Life: The Secret to Resilience in a Changing World

Are you feeling rushed as you read these words right now? Welcome to the modern world of constant connectivity! And the faster our pace of life, the more essential it becomes to nurture our inner life for resilience.

We’re living in an amazing age, every bit as futuristic as the Jetsons or Star Trek sagas some of us grew up with. I love being able to connect face to face with clients on the other side of the world, or download a song in a second. Yet this continuous connectivity also poses a challenge: many of us have trouble disconnecting from all the intensity for some peace and quiet. Our inner life can silently wither even as we chase the outer holy grail of success.

The thinner we spread ourselves, the more we skitter across the surface of our outer lives, never going deep. And technology can track us down just about anywhere, anytime, it seems there is literally no escape!

Trying to keep up the pace can take a huge toll. That stress shows up in suppressed immune systems, high blood pressure, anxiety, depression, insomnia, and digestive ailments.

What is needed is more resilience: the ability to rebound from setbacks and challenges, similar to the elasticity of a rubber band returning to its original shape after stretching.

Resilience can be developed with practice, just as you can develop muscle strength by exercising.

The process of developing resilience starts with a reminder that our true nature is eternal and not time-bound. We literally need to disconnect and remember that our souls exist in timelessness.  Poet E. E. Cummings put it this way:

“How fortunate are you and I
whose home is timelessness:
We who have wandered down
from fragrant mountains of eternal now
to frolic in such mysteries
as birth and death
a day, or maybe even less…”

By connecting to the soul’s eternal nature, we regain our inner sense of poise. We can learn to not push into the future, nor run from the past, but to walk our path in this present moment with unhurried grace.  Lama Surya Das calls this place of the eternal present “Buddha Standard Time.” In his book with the same title, he quotes Liu Wenmin, an early sixteenth century poet, making peace with time:

“To be able to be unhurried when hurried;
To be able not to slack off when relaxed;
To be able not to be frightened
And at a loss for what to do,
When frightened and at a loss;
This is the learning that returns us
To our natural state and transforms our lives.”

The busier we are, the more we need time out of the rat race to regain perspective and renew ourselves from within. It is our inner life that ultimately sustains us, and not the outer bells and whistles.

Honoring your inner path of truth is essential for a meaningful life. Research by palliative caretaker Bronnie Ware showed the number one regret of dying people is wishing they’d had the courage to live a life true to themselves, and not the life others expected from them.

How do we honor our inner compass amid the frenetic demands of life so we can live without regrets? Three concepts come to mind: Stay true. Stay present. Follow the energy.

  1. Stay True:

A commitment to truth, at all levels, is automatically a commitment to freedom.  It is always truth that sets us free. And where Higher truth prevails, why would anyone need to lie?

In Shakespeare’s Hamlet, Polonius advises his son Laertes:

To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.”

Any “security” gained through loss of inner freedom actually submits to fear at the cost of integrity and truth.  A nation that puts national security above personal freedom has lost its true power base.  In saying this, I am not suggesting that a country should suddenly lower its guard against all enemies (both real and imagined). I am saying that addressing the outer issue before addressing the inner conditions in consciousness that created it, will simply not solve the problem.

This is why politics is not the answer to what plagues the human condition. Politics is like a trainer who seeks to harness and train the collective energy so it will function for the good of all. It will ultimately succeed only at the lowest common denominator.

True freedom is an inside job that starts with elevating consciousness at the individual level by aligning to Higher truth. That alignment fosters confidence, resilience and trust.

  1. Stay Present.

Stay in the Now.  Past and future are always adjuncts to that.  Don’t let the busy-ness of the world rob you of this priceless gift of NOW.

That means you need to make peace with your past so you can live without regrets. It also means you need to release the need to control the future because that is an illusion causing unnecessary anxiety.

You and I do not know what the future will look like because it is not yet manifest. There is no other human who can accurately predict how life will play out, because the future is created through a myriad possibilities and individual choices that ultimately manifest when conditions are favorable.

There are no veterans or pros for where humanity is going now – it is new to all of us. The choices you and I make in each present moment, will collectively decide the future that unfolds for us. So let’s nurture our inner resilience and stay true to our path right here, right now!

  1. Follow The Energy.

Let your body be your barometer. It will show you what you really need.  You always create the perfect scenarios to get what you really need.

There are no good or bad energies.  All people and things are just energy… which is, essentially, neutral.  Energy is as neutral as the electric current that lights up both a cathedral and a drug lab.

Some frequencies of energy may seem particularly useful and attractive to you for where you’re at in your individual consciousness right now. Other frequencies can repulse for the same reason. That does not make them good or bad; they are simply useful to your journey at this particular time or not.

Pay attention to the things that attract or repel you; they are clues to what you need to do, choose or say in order to move forward on your path.

Together, these three principles can help you cultivate a richer and more resilient inner life, no matter how much turmoil you face in your environment.

About the author

©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.

Five Lies To Banish From Your Life

We’ve all been there: resolving to do great things with our lives, our careers, our relationships or our health, only to find that we somehow keep making the same mistakes. We fall back into the same old habits because we still believe the same old lies.

But no more! When you become conscious of the five core lies holding humans back from reaching their highest potential, you can reclaim your truth and choose to live from your personal power instead.

Living an authentic life requires courage, compassion and connection. You need courage to face your imperfections and the compassion to embrace them, so you no longer need to create distractions or false ego constructs to survive. That allows you to connect to your full potential, allowing the light of truth to set you free. Here are the lies you want to recognize, along with better options for an authentic life:

Lie #1: Winner takes all

Human beings have evolved in some astonishing ways on this planet. And yet, we have held on to some of the limitations imposed by ancient survival needs. One of the most insidious is the limiting belief that everything can be reduced to win or lose. This form of scarcity thinking makes us believe that life is about everything or nothing, and winner takes all. It also causes us to think that for every win there must be a loss, and nobody wants to be at the short end. This lie causes excessive competition because if you gain something, it may mean a loss to me somehow.

Nothing could be further from the truth! We live in an abundant Universe. Look around and you will see how lavishly Nature shares her bounty with everyone. In fact, we do not have a food scarcity problem or a scarcity of resources on this planet; we have a problem of hoarding and greed brought on by the primal lie that winner takes all. The truth is that there is enough for everyone, and we can help restore equality from wherever we are – simply by acting on the truth of inherent abundance, instead of holding on to the lie of scarcity.

Lie # 2: You’re alone

Loneliness is the symptom of a life that looks for validation in the outer, material world. Solitude, on the other hand, is stepping away from the crowd in order to savor the richness of a multidimensional experience which flows from a vibrant inner connection to Source. Poet May Sarton put it this way: “Loneliness is the poverty of self; solitude is richness of self.”

We are not alone on this planet, in this life or at any moment. We are surrounded by the companionship of Creation; embraced by unseen arms whenever we feel vulnerable or afraid. You can overcome the lie of being alone by deepening your connection to nature, to your inner Self and to your Source. The richness of this multidimensional connection is your innate birthright as a human being, and it will sustain you when the fickle promises of the physical world fail. You are always connected to Source.

Lie # 3: The world is always getting worse

Ah, this lie screams at you the minute you turn on the daily news, right! It is always ready to point out what’s wrong in the world because that feeds the ego’s need for survival and keeps the false circuitry of survival – scarcity – competition going.

Don’t feed the lie; change your channel. Things are not always getting worse, they are merely changing. Change is a fact of life, whether we like it or not. As things change and show up differently, we may need to remind ourselves that different is not necessarily worse. Renowned psychiatrist Dr. David R. Hawkins used to say, “Just because you prefer chocolate, you don’t have to hate vanilla.”

Change ushers in new possibilities. Throughout history, every civilization that crumbled, made way for new and different societies to emerge. Ultimately, these changes brought about the incredible developments we enjoy today. A much more empowering response to change is to find the possibilities in each change and to align with that, rather than to fight the process.

Lie # 4: Others have the power to define you

People love to judge, don’t they? Pick up a magazine and you’ll see how much gossip flies around anybody who lives in public. But do the gossipers really know the people they judge? Have they seen into another’s heart? When you allow others to define or judge you, you are giving away your power to a lie. You compromise your truth to fit into their limited mold, and you deny your uniqueness as a soul.

You are in this life for much more than that! You are free to grow, become and evolve; you don’t need to buy into the limiting peer pressure and group think of others who can only see on the surface. Everything negative others say about you, is really about them, not about you.

Refuse to buy into the limiting viewpoints of others. You have bigger fish to fry! Tune out the naysayers and celebrate your own magnificence. Your purpose in this life is not to keep others happy, but to seek your own fulfillment by magnifying your potential.

Lie # 5: To survive, you have to stay in negative agreements.

So often, one person in a group starts talking down about someone or something and you feel the pressure building as others join in. It feels as if you need to agree with the negative viewpoints to fit in. You may even feel as if you have to share their hatred to belong with them. Well, that’s a big, fat lie!

Complaining and negativity hurt you because they set up negative outlooks in you. You do not need to join the hate fest to establish rapport, ever! You are not obligated to agree with others, especially when their limiting behavior is harmful to you.

Instead, choose to remove yourself from negative environment that are toxic to your well-being. Surround yourself with positivity. Seek out individuals who are forward thinkers, and cultivate friendships with people who expect miracles and are open to all possibilities.

Banish these five lies and you’ll change your life. It will shift you into a place of empowerment where you can thrive.

By challenging these five lies whenever they surface, you can make a different choice to align with truth instead.

Finally, remember that this is a journey and not a sprint. When you start peeling back the lies that have held you back and reclaim your truth, remember to practice the same kindness and forgiveness toward yourself that you offer to others. It is the power of love that transforms, not the brute force of judgment. Always remember the power of love, and that your best effort is enough.

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