by Ada Porat | Feb 28, 2023 | Change bad habits, Cope with change, Empowering changes, Resilience, Spirituality
Photo Credit: Alexander Schimmeck, Unsplash
Everyone desires to improve their life in some way: to heal something, change limiting habits, find a romantic partner, lose weight, reach their highest potential, develop intuition, find their soul purpose, and more.
As long as we are alive, this process continues. Norman Mailer put it this way: “Every moment of one’s existence one is growing into more or retreating into less. One is always living a little more or dying a little bit.” There’s always a next step waiting to be taken, yet everyone – absolutely everyone – has trouble accomplishing these laudable goals. In fact, we spend an inordinate time making up reasons and excuses for not moving forward.
Not moving forward is extremely painful. It creates a sense of frustration with yourself because the desire to grow and expand comes from your soul. Resistance to following your path blocks the very expression of your soul. Imagine the impact of such dense emotions that accumulate in the body over years of wrestling with the same dysfunctional patterns!
Here are three practical steps to help you get unstuck and move forward more effectively:
- Ditch fear of humiliation
Most people are controlled by fear of being humiliated or judged by others – and that fear prevents them from moving forward in their lives.
You can overcome this paralyzing fear by recognizing that your true locus of control is inside of you; it does not come from anyone outside you. When you acknowledge the Divine Presence in you and start to follow its gentle prompting, you’ll find the courage and validation you seek within yourself.
Looking outside ourselves for approval or acceptance is an ego trap. It breeds fear of being humiliated whenever external feedback conflicts with our ego needs and is actually a form of pride.
True commitment to our soul path brings about a sense of authentic humility. When we no longer seek approval from outside ourselves, we’re better able to align with Higher truth within. Our relationship with Spirit cultivates deep inner honesty and humility within us. We no longer need to impress or win the fleeting approval of others; instead, we embrace with our true identity as souls and learn to operate by Higher law, resulting in inner peace.
Fantasy or reality?
Do you find yourself bargaining that you’ll do what you need to as soon as the children are grown, or after you’re out of debt, or once you get a new job? Are you dreaming of the life you desire if only you had the money, time or resources? Empty dreams are fantasy – they keep us in a state of scarcity unless we take appropriate action!
Here’s another way to look at life: Everything that shows up in your life and mine, is perfect for the purpose of our growth… not our comfort! On this planet, results are built by matching vision with action, step by step. Nothing falls from the sky ready-made, and circumstances never pause to create the perfect show-stopping moment for us to step into. If we wait for the perfect opportunity before taking action, we may even miss the steppingstones along the way. To break free from wishful thinking, the question to ask yourself instead is, “What I am I doing in the meantime?”
A colleague of mine used to tell her clients, “It’s only too late if you don’t start now!” You cannot satisfy your soul’s yearning with empty dreams and promises – you’re made of better stuff and your soul knows that! Start taking action now with the guidance you already have, and the next step will show up. When guidance is given but you don’t act on it, you may end up with information overload – overwhelmed, stuck or frustrated – whereas steady action will clear the way forward.
Information overload
Information overload can come from asking for input from too many people but never acting on the information stuffed into your energy field. It is normal to gather information before moving forward. The trap lies in over-analyzing each piece of information or waiting for more guidance to appear before acting. This can move you into analysis paralysis or information overload with too much data floating around in your mind, triggering your fears, anxieties, limitations, or past trauma, so you end up too confused to start. Information overload also happens when giving your power away to others instead of taking full responsibility for your own life.
To break free from the bog of information overload, go back to the beginning and look at the very first step that needs to be taken. If internal chatter of fear, bargaining or limitation arises in response, deal with it! Your power lies in choosing your truth in the face of your fears. Drill down to the source of fear and recognize it for what it is – the ego’s stalling tactic to keep you from changing. Let go of it and take the first step forward despite the fear, and it will diminish. Once you’ve taken the first step, you can ask for more guidance, listening within for it. The next breadcrumb will show up!
Collectively, these three steps can help you get unstuck from the sticky bogs of stagnation, and help you live more effectively.
©Copyright Ada Porat. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached. For more information, visit https://AdaPorat.com
by Ada Porat | Jan 16, 2023 | Conscious living, Cope with change, Life skills, Personal growth, Resilience
Photo Credit: Francesco, Unsplash
We all feel the enormous impact of irreversible change that has swept around the globe in recent years. None of us knows exactly how our lives will be different by the end of this decade; we simply know that it will be different in more ways we can imagine. We cannot go back to yesterday or the life we lived ten years ago. Life as we knew it, is over – there is no going back.
Yet even as we recognize that the past is irrevocably over, we feel the stirring of something new within, the inklings of a new way of life that can replace the old. This gentle shift within offers us an incredible opportunity to become positive change agents who create innovative pathways, tools and systems for a new way of life to emerge.
You and I are living on the cusp between the old and the new; we are the ones who get to choose and lean into a new way, creating a new world and a fresh start. The choices we make in each present moment are energizing the shifts to create a sustainable future for us all.
Exciting? Oh, yes! And a little scary? Of course!
These times of change and uncertainty are messy for sure. Many of us are grieving losses that have piled up in recent years: loved ones, work, friends, homes, health, life as we knew it, and more. We may even yearn for the “good old days” if ever there was such a thing.
There are no iron-clad guarantees and reassurances for this process involving the death and rebirth of our physical reality – and so everyone is learning to adapt and innovate.
And yet as Nature reminds us with each passing season, death is followed by rebirth in a continuous cycle of life.
Around us, the totality of life remains filled with untapped possibilities and probabilities. Every challenging circumstance contains the seeds of possibility for us to tap into and create more optimal outcomes from the inside out.
What do you wish to see in your world? How do you intend to participate to bring that about? It is indeed a time to dream big, to vision and be bold.
As we move forward on this bridge between the world we knew and the one we are creating, we need to travel light: we need to let go of things outside ourselves that we cannot control, so we can take charge of our inner reality, which is completely in our hands. We also need step into our individual and collective maturity to support wise choices. Let’s look at how to get from here to there.
During times of uncertainty, emotions can feel overwhelming. Daily events may trigger shock, grief, fear or anxiety. These emotions are to be expected, because we are awash in a sea change of unknown currents.
When our survival instincts are triggered, we can become defensive, reverting to basic survival tactics and protective measurements for a sense of security. However, defensiveness keeps us stuck in resistance and prevents us from moving forward.
To keep moving, it is important to remember who you really are: you’re not just an ego in a body suit, you are an eternal soul who came on this earth journey to participate in the evolving consciousness of all life at this time.
You are so much more than your physical being! There are more resources available to you at non-physical levels than you can imagine. Whenever you start to feel overwhelmed, stop for a moment and take inventory of your spiritual resources in the world of Cause, rather the limited results around you in the world of Effects.
Humans are blessed with innate creativity and innovation. Despite challenges – and perhaps even because of them – we can create effective pathways forward.
We simply need to let go of lower levels of consciousness from where the problems in our world were created. Clearly, the challenges of our time require more than the duality-based limitations of an outdated Cartesian world view. We are asked to embrace the myriad possibilities coexisting in the Field, because higher awareness and a larger scope are essential for creating optimal outcomes now.
These uncertain times invite us to return to right relationship with our innate Self. We’re learning what no longer works, what no longer nourishes us, and what we no longer tolerate. We’re recognizing what we truly want from life, so we can make better choices for ourselves and the greater good.
Humanity has outgrown the childlike stance where a few can dictate and make choices for the collective. As each one of us steps into maturity and takes full responsibility for our own decisions, it will ripple outward and create optimal collective outcomes.
No matter how bleak and uncertain things appear to you, don’t look back. Go beyond!
Reach beneath the surface defenses of reactivity and blame, to the Presence of Spirit at your core. That Presence contains all possibilities and potentialities.
Whenever you feel overwhelmed, take a moment to enter that inner space of peace and calm. Simply hold that space until clarity arises. In so doing, you open up to possibilities beyond linear thinking so you can make optimal choices.
Times of uncertainty also call for spiritual maturity. We’re asked to let go of waiting to be rescued, and to step onto the path as mature being, knowing that we are the very ones we’ve been waiting for. Spiritual maturity empowers us to leave behind the outdated, limiting roles assigned to us so we can co-create a better future.
Maturity gives us faith in unseen possibilities, so we can hold onto the intention for what can be. It asks us to look beyond the limitations of what was or is, so we can see and embrace new possibilities that show up now.
This is an invitation to become fearless! Do not allow obstacles on the surface of life to undermine your faith. Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of what is not yet seen. Hold on to that and you will prevail.
We’re also need to travel light. It’s time to clear out old conditioning, to heal the memories of past wounds, and to let go of what’s no longer needed. By freeing ourselves from past hurt and limitations, we create more room for our lives to unfold.
Do not let others tell you what is appropriate for you. When you let others decide for you, you abdicate your power. Evaluate, contemplate within and choose for yourself.
Above all, embrace the process of individual growth, for it is your evolutionary lifeline. Let go of resistance and you will discover new possibilities emerging from the Truth within.
As mature beings, we learn to be at peace with not knowing. We embrace the ever-changing nature of life and take full responsibility for our individual choices along the way.
It is safe to trust in the benevolent plan of a loving Creator – and to trust yourself. Personal mastery requires you to trust yourself, trust the unseen hands that guide and uphold you, and to trust the Divine plan which may be invisible to the eye, yet is unfolding even now.
Maturity also teaches us to stay in the void of uncertainty and discomfort; to resist grabbing for some fake version of permanency or settle for some substance to numb our awareness. The security we want is within; it does not lie outside of us.
When borne of fear or resistance, compromise is not our friend. To evolve, we dare not let the familiarity of known limitations hold us back from the limitless possibilities we do not yet see. Resolve not to settle for the devil you know, but to push beyond.
Personal mastery shifts our focus away from external conditions beyond our control to our inner life over which we have ALL control. That is where we find the innate power, peace and creativity to creative a better world where everyone can thrive.
About the author
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://www.adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
by Ada Porat | Dec 20, 2022 | Conscious living, Mindfulness, Peace, Spirituality
Photo credit: Sabine Schulte, Unsplash
Some people possess a very special quality: they embody the presence of now in their hearts. When we have a chance to sit close to such a person, we feel calm. They radiate an energy of peace that penetrates us deeply. It stills our wandering thoughts and quiets our worry.
Whenever we have a chance to walk alongside those souls who live in the eternal now, we can feel this subtle source of peace and joy. Through their presence, we are able to connect to that source as well. Their quiet consistency brings peace to the turbulence in the world around them, and they lead us by example to live in peace.
You too can live like this. You can shed your learned hurry and move through life as if there is no deadline to meet, no need to be somewhere else in this moment. You can move through life as if you are already where you need to be — as if you are arriving with every step. Each step can bring you closer to that perennial peace within —embodied in the presence of now.
When we choose to move through life like this, we lose our sense of isolation in the world. We are no longer separate individuals rushing about to avoid the bad and reach for good. Instead, we start feeling again our connection to the whole, like droplets remembering that they belong to the ocean. The drop of water does not need to do anything – it feels the embrace of the ocean and let itself be carried along by the current in each present moment.
That current is our spiritual core; the inner voice that whispers to us when we tune out the brassy loudness of the material world. To feel truly alive and at peace, it is essential to learn how to do that.
Perhaps you feel as if the opportunity for peace has passed you by; you said or did things that caused pain or separation between you and others. Perhaps you were not able to see truth clearly and judged from a place of fear or anger. It may feel as if it is too late to make amends; too much water has passed under the bridge.
Yet even the work of healing the past lies in the present moment. From this place of mindfulness, you can choose forgiveness and reconciliation to clear away misunderstandings, anger and sadness from the past. It is exactly in this moment, now, that the work of healing must be done to set your soul free.
No matter how difficult the challenges of the past have been, you are here now, reading these words. You are alive! Treasure the reality that you are alive in this moment, and embrace the opportunity for healing it offers. Sit down quietly and go within: meditate to look deep and sweep away the woundedness, prejudice and mistakes of the past. Accept the opportunity offered by the presence of now.
The present moment offers us a gift. It allows us to forgive, heal and return to peace. Life is present for you in this moment, waiting for you to choose what you will do with it, and in so doing, what quality of peace you will experience.
About the author
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
by Ada Porat | Nov 22, 2022 | Gratitude, Happiness, Personal growth
Photo Credit: Chris Lawson, Unsplash
What would life look like if we experienced more gratitude? Imagine your satisfaction when someone expresses gratitude for your efforts; or your contentment when feeling happy about life, right in this moment. We can all have more of that because growing gratitude is a valuable life skill we can learn!
The simple attitude of gratitude is one of the most powerful creative energies we can work with. It transforms our consciousness because energy flows to whatever we focus on, and makes it grow.
Gratitude also increases happiness. When we express genuine appreciation for the goodness we already enjoy each day, we cultivate happiness in our lives.
Perhaps you have not yet lost the twenty pounds you want to, but you have learned to make better food choices. Or you have not yet found the love of your life, but you have been blessed with loving relatives and friends.
It’s a simple yet powerful principle: You can develop more of what you desire in life by noticing what you DO have already and growing an attitude of gratitude for that. You have the power to create more of what you love by expressing genuine appreciation for the good things you already have.
Expressing gratitude is a learned skill. It is done not in a superficial or schmaltzy way, but through genuinely heartfelt, eyeball-to-eyeball or heart-to-heart connection. It involves appreciation delivered with real meaning rather than some perfunctory mumblings or syrupy platitudes.
Just think of all the meaningful things that you have already enjoyed today: the smell of coffee that got you going, a warm shower, soft towels, a selection of clean clothes in your closet, sunshine warming your face, tantalizing aromas all around, the ability to walk and talk… there’s so much to be grateful for!
Once the habit of growing and showing attitude takes hold, you’ll start noticing more and more of life’s blessings around you. Gratitude expands our hearts to notice more of what we already have appreciation for.
Imagine how relationships would be enhanced if you used the same approach to express appreciation for the people in your life!
Take a few moments to consider the relationships you’re grateful for. Reflect on the qualities you appreciate in each of your relatives and friends: the smile on a child’s face, the hug of a loved one, the spontaneous playfulness of a friend… and even their individual ways of craziness! We can find something to be grateful for in every person or situation.
I had an eccentric great-aunt who had the knack for making keen observations about others at the most inappropriate times. I used to blush in embarrassment at her unflinching directness, yet when she was no longer able to attend family gatherings, her special brand of candor was sorely missed. Only then did I realize how her unique brand of eccentricity enriched our lives.
Perhaps there are a few people with varying degrees of eccentricity populating your life as well. They also have a role to fulfill — even if it is to stretch your tolerance level, teach patience or give you an opportunity to forgive! And yes, they offer you an opportunity to grow more gratitude.
Expressing gratitude is a priceless gift we can offer ourselves and others. Now is a perfect time to express your gratitude to people who have touched your life. Let them know what you love about them and how it makes you feel. You’ll add meaning to their lives while strengthening your relationships.
Growing gratitude is indeed a valuable life skill we can learn to enhance our quality of life.
About The Author:
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
by Ada Porat | Oct 26, 2022 | Conscious living, Mindfulness, Peace, Personal growth, Spirituality
Photo Credit: Elijah Hiett, Unsplash
I once had a client tell me: “Everything I’ve ever let go of had my claw marks all over it, and it hurt!” Sound familiar?
Many of us struggle with surrender or letting go because we see it as defeat or giving up. It scares us. We may equate surrender with quitting or failure, yet true surrender ultimately sets us free and empowers us.
True surrender asks us to open our hearts and look beyond our limited attachments. It invites us to let go of things that ultimately cause us pain, so we can embrace higher blessings. It is a transformative practice that we can nurture daily by bringing present moment awareness to our lives: How we think and act, what we choose, and where we place our focus.
Surrender happens in very practical ways of daily life. It’s not some abstract spiritual ideal for holy people, but rather the process of allowing Life Force to move through us and clear out what is no longer beneficial. It is an opportunity to open our hearts and to look beyond our fears, expectations, woundedness and disappointments to the freedom and peace that awaits when we let go of those lesser energies. Letting go is an invitation to reach beyond our limitations toward higher levels of being.
Surrender is neither defeat nor resignation. It activates our natural ability to let go of what now longer serves us. The process of surrender invites us to stop clinging and to view all our experiences with self-compassion. It calls us into a deeper relationship with the Creative Presence beyond our individual experiences.
The passing parade of everyday encounters offer us multiple opportunities for surrender. Do you feel put out by a last-minute change in schedule? Letting go of that can open your heart to receive an unexpected blessing you would have otherwise missed. Stuck in traffic? Letting go of impatience frees up your mind to give thanks for many other things that have worked out for you.
Surrender requires a change of focus. Instead of resorting to habitual knee-jerk reactions, we choose to become fully conscious of the bigger picture and choose a more appropriate response. We can let go of old beliefs and engage a broader perspective with more trust, deeper compassion for ourselves and others, and acceptance of what is.
Surrender also requires us to trust in the larger process. We are asked to stop clinging to our preconceived ideas about life, to let go and to let Higher consciousness guide us past our limiting attachments to something better. When we open to the process of surrender, we recognize that it is our desperate clinging to the known, that most often cause us pain. When we open our hearts to let go of that to which we cling, we find the grace to also embrace that which we resist. By letting go, we find personal growth and peace.
When struggling with letting go, it helps to remember that we’re simply letting go of old programs, limitations or feelings that have victimized and enslaved us for a long time. These old programs and coping mechanisms have simply blinded us to the higher truth of our real identity. We are letting go of what no longer serves us, to make room for what is more aligned with our path now!
The process of surrender is not complicated, but it does require self-discipline. It involves becoming aware of a reactive feeling as it arises within and staying with it; letting that feeling run its course without resisting, changing or trying to do anything else about it.
It’s helpful to remember that you are not your feelings; you exist beyond your feelings because you are able to observe them, so you are more than your feelings and cannot be swept away by them. From that perspective, you then simply observe what you are feeling – without resisting it, venting it, fearing it, condemning it, or moralizing about it. You are not judging the feeling because you recognize that it is just a feeling. You simply stay with the feeling and surrender all effort or desire to modify it in any way. You even let go of wanting to resist the feeling. It simply is what it is!
It is resistance that keeps our unwanted feelings going. A feeling that is not resisted will dissolve as the energy behind it dissipates. As soon as you find yourself no longer resisting or trying to avoid or modify the feeling, it will dissipate and shift to another feeling with a lighter sensation such as calm.
When you first start the process of surrender, you may notice how fear or guilt arise around the feelings you have, adding layers to the feeling. For example, you may notice some reaction that comes up in response to a feeling of fear you’re experiencing. You may be afraid of feeling fear, or you may judge your fear of feeling the fear. When this happens, just let go of the surrounding fear or judgment first, and then you’ll be able to let the core fear itself drain away.
To effectively surrender emotions you’d previously clung to or resisted unconsciously, it is helpful to stay fully present with your feelings. Ignore any thoughts, stories, or rationalizations that may arise in your mind. Renown psychiatrist Dr. David R. Hawkins used to say that thoughts are endless and self-reinforcing, so they only breed more thoughts. When you surrender all thoughts around a feeling, you will notice that old, entrenched feelings dissolve faster and with more ease.
You will also notice that all negative feelings are ultimately associated with the basic survival instinct. Feelings are merely survival programs that the mind believes are necessary for survival. By surrendering to the process and letting the feelings run their course, you are progressively winding down these outdated programs and you will experience more peace.
We are asked to surrender many times daily: in our work, love, relationships, and bodies. It takes great courage to let go and surrender to what is. It takes a firm commitment to open our hearts and hands, releasing what we’ve clung to. And yet, when we do this work, our hearts open to more peace, equanimity, and trust to enrich our lives.
When we stay present in each moment, we learn to recognize opportunities for surrender as calls for growth everywhere in life. It becomes a practical way of handling relationships, limitations and challenges. It also becomes a deeply personal journey of inner transformation. Instead of bemoaning our lot, we start to welcome every experience as a hand-picked opportunity for our ultimate learning and growth.
Living and letting go are intertwined. The more we surrender our resistance to unwanted difficulties, the more space we open up for all that’s beautiful, profound, and abundant. We attune to the sacred beauty of whatever is right in front of us at any given time.
About The Author:
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
