by Ada Porat | Dec 31, 2013 | Conscious living, Cope with change, Decision-making, Life coaching, Mindfulness
Still feeling a pang of guilt because last year’s resolutions did not make it past Valentine’s Day?
Perhaps those resolutions never stood a chance because you did not prime the pump first! Let me explain.
Most of us are looking for similar things in life: more time, love, joy, health and quality of life. What we sometimes forget, is that good things don’t simply fall down from the sky. We need to put some effort towards getting the outcomes we desire!
On my grandfather’s farm was a creaky old water pump. Before it would start drawing water from the well, it had to be primed with a cup of water. As a child, I used to love participating by pouring a cup of water down the pump before pumping the squeaky handle up and down, up and down… until a small stream of water would start running from the spout. Once the water started flowing, one could fill up as many buckets with water as needed, and it all started with the simple act of priming the pump with water first.
The water pump would not yield water if primed with rocks. It needed to be primed with water – the same substance I desired from it. In life it works the same way: we prime the pump of life with that which we contribute, and we attract that which we emanate. If we emanate lack, we cannot attract abundance and if we emanate anger, we cannot attract love. Because like attracts like, we therefore need to first prime the pump by giving of that which we desire.
In the process, the very quality we focus on giving becomes an integral part of our being. Just as that old water pump on the farm yielded as much water as desired after it was primed, a life that exudes love, abundance and joy, draws more of the same qualities.
This year, instead of making the same old New Year resolutions, perhaps it would be more meaningful to prime the pump with the very qualities you would like to see more of in your life.
Here are some ideas to get you started. By practicing even just one of these principles consistently over time, you will find that life returns to you a bountiful measure of the same.
- I treat everyone in my life with the love and respect that I would receive from them.
- I believe it is more important to be loving than to be right, and I apply this in my life daily.
- I look for the beauty in every person and everything that crosses my path.
- I practice lovingkindness toward all sentient beings.
- I take steps to simplify my life so I can enjoy more with less.
- I find time to nurture my body, mind and soul, even if it is only a few minutes each day.
- I focus on what is right rather than what is wrong.
- I forgive those who have hurt me and let go of old wrongs so there may be peace on earth.
- I look for solutions, not for scapegoats.
- I find and express gratitude in my life each day.
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
by Ada Porat | Nov 14, 2013 | Change bad habits, Conscious living, Cope with change, Decision-making, Life coaching, Life transitions
How resilient are you? Resilience is defined as the ability to return to your original form after being bent, stretched or compressed. It’s the ability to readily recover from illness or adversity. And success depends on your skill at cultivating resilience!
Life’s setbacks and disasters often arrive without prior warning. And while we may not have a choice as to what happens in our lives, we do have a choice in how we respond.
A healthy response requires cultivating inner resilience to recover from setbacks, broken hearts and dreams, financial crisis, loss of a loved one, or health setbacks.
The good news is that you and I can succeed at cultivating resilience. We can exercise it like a muscle, and in the process we can turn the challenging circumstances of our lives into opportunities that deepen our faith and strengthen our very fiber.
Cultivating resilience requires the ability to ask tough questions of yourself and be honest with your answers. If you had something to do with your loss or setback, it is important to accept responsibility for your share of it.
It also requires a sense of responsibility: the understanding that we are all connected and that your actions – for better or for worse – affect others. While you may not have control over the actions of others, accepting full responsibility for your own actions sets you free to respond in a manner that contributes to the greater good.
Cultivating resilience calls for humor to help reframe daunting obstacles and setbacks. When all else fails, learn to laugh at yourself and at the absurdity of your situation. When doctors handed journalist Norman Cousins a grave medical prognosis, he resolved to take charge of the things he could do: he checked himself out of the hospital, embarked on his own healing regimen, watched comedies… and literally laughed himself back to health!
Above all, cultivating resilience calls for faith: faith in your guidance, purpose and potential; faith to commit to life daily; and faith to get back up when circumstances knock you down. Once, when life had knocked me completely off my feet, a friend sent me a card that simply read,
”Fall down
seven times,
stand up eight.”
This Buddhist saying reaffirmed my faith and gave me the courage to keep going.
Every time you get up after a setback, every time you overcome a challenge in life, you develop more resilience.
May you grow, prosper and succeed despite your current challenges. May you grow stronger and more abundant despite the setbacks you’ve suffered in life, and may you cultivate resilience to see you through every challenge!
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
by Ada Porat | Sep 18, 2013 | Body Mind Spirit, Conscious living, Cope with change, Decision-making, Fear and anxiety, Life coaching, Life transitions
Every option seems to have a downside. How do I know what’s best? I’m so confused,” a friend recently complained.
My friend was caught in a quandary familiar to many of us. After losing a well-paying job and pounding the pavement for months to find another, an excellent opportunity had just come up – but it required moving out of state. Now a decision had to be made: stay on unemployment and hope for something to turn up locally, uproot the family to accept the offer out of state… or consider something different altogether?
Every option offered potential benefits as well as the potential for failure. The conversation reminded me of six principles of effective decision-making that the school of life taught me.
1. Decision-making is easy when there are no discrepancies in your value system
Fact is, there are decisions to be made every moment of life. Over time, these choices tend to unfold as failure or success, fulfillment or disappointment, or any of the myriad choices in between. So how can we optimize decision-making and minimize the downside?
A clear understanding of your core values will help you choose well at the decision-making junctions of life. These inner values and your emotions around them form an integral part of the decision-making process. Awareness of your core values makes it easier for you to choose options that are in harmony with those values. In the example above, a bit of probing help my friend recognize her core values, which includes being able to provide for her family. Once she recognized this core value, it was easier for her to embrace the idea of working out of town for a while instead of clinging to the security of the known.
2. Effective decision-making deals decisively with fear
I’ve found that most folk who cling to the comfort and security of their known environment, are doing so from fear: fear of the unknown, fear of failing, fear of making mistakes. If you want to make great decisions, you absolutely need to evict fear from your life. It is a dream killer and a useless waste of energy!
3. Effective decision-making looks at content as well as context
Your inner values and desires constitute the immediate content of your decisions. Beyond that inner world of content, effective decision-making also requires you to consider relevant factors in your external environment. When external factors are ignored, even great decisions can lead to failure. In the example above, some of the external factors my friend needed to consider included the timing of the job offer, overall economic conditions, the availability of other opportunities, and how each decision might impact the family.
4. Effective decision-making requires you to be truthful
Decisions based on inner truth lead to empowerment. Choices that compromise your truth, lead to conflict and confusion.
Socrates observed that each of us chooses what we believe to be optimal, given our level of awareness and insight at the time. Our choices create a resonant frequency field which attracts resonant energies and repels dissonant frequencies. Over time, particles of probability in this attractor field evolve into possibilities that manifest as reality. Our thoughts and choices ultimately manifest as things, so it behooves us to focus on truth!
You cannot live an authentic life while dishonoring your inner truth. There comes a time for each of us when we must choose to honor our truth and let the chips fall where they may. As Marianne Williamson has said, our playing small does not serve the world.
The Course in Miracles teaches that Truth is not frail. Truth can withstand the demands of the ego. It can surmount envy, misconceptions and judgment, because it needs no defense.
True power lies in choosing from within, from the strength of having owned your fears, from the gentleness that you carry with grace. Each time you choose to honor your truth, you are creating more resonance to empower your journey.
5. Effective decision-making needs focused intention
Do you know what is really motivating you? A great way of drilling down to your true intention is by asking yourself effective questions. Answering these questions will help you uncover patterns of self-sabotage, fear or compromise so you can make clear decisions. Author Debbie Ford outlines great questions in her book, The Right Questions. Here are a few:
- Will this choice propel me toward an inspiring future or keep me stuck in the past?
- Will this choice bring me long-term fulfillment or short-term gratification?
- Am I standing in my power or am I trying to please another?
- Am I looking for what is right or for what is wrong?
- Will this choice add to my life force or rob me of energy?
- Will I use this situation as a catalyst to grow or as an excuse to beat myself up?
- Does this choice empower or disempower me?
- Is this an act of self-love or is it an act of self-sabotage?
- Is this an act of faith or is it an act of fear?
6. Effective decision-making requires involvement of body, mind and soul
Finally, sound decision-making requires that you listen to the subtle messages within you at all levels: body, mind and soul. You can learn to tap into your innate wisdom by cultivating healthy connections among your body, mind and soul. Each of these levels communicates in different ways. Take time for meditation or contemplation. It will help you stay centered and at peace. Remain aware of your spiritual core guiding you through the physical challenges of life, and you will become effective at decision-making.
Once you’ve made a decision, stay flexible and embrace ambiguity. As additional information surfaces, you may want to adapt to it. Remember, change is usually a messy process! Flexibility makes it easier to navigate through change so you can optimize outcomes.
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
by Ada Porat | Jul 1, 2013 | Abundance, Conscious living, Cope with change, Decision-making, Life coaching, Life transitions
“Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?”
These words of poet Mary Oliver strike a cord with me. You see, I believe that you and I did not appear in this life by random chance. We are here to play a unique part in the ongoing circle of life. Whatever it is you plan to do, that path is already calling to you.
Question is, how do you find that path? How do you know where to go and what to do to have the most impact?
I’d like to offer you an app to help you find and stay the course.
This app is not for your Ipad or Android – it’s an app for your life. The acronym APP stands for ALIGNMENT, PASSION and PERSEVERANCE. Together, these three components will unlock the doors to success in your life, no matter where you go. Let’s take a look at each of them.
Alignment
The first part of the app is ALIGNMENT. It asks you to live a life that is aligned with your core values and goals. You will always have the most impact when you make decisions that are aligned with your core values and goals.
Betraying or compromising your core values may look like a shortcut. It may even bring the initial trappings of success, but it will always leave you feeling empty and unfulfilled. True peace of mind comes from living a life that is aligned with your values, truth and principles.
When you make choices that are aligned with your core values and goals, you’ll be in integrity; you’ll be strong, and you’ll find a way around every obstacle until you reach your goals.
Passion
The second part of the life app reminds you to pursue your dreams with PASSION.
What is it that you feel most passionate about? What gets you out of bed with enthusiasm, lighting up your face when you talk about it? Pay attention to these signs, because the very things you care about passionately, are also the things you are hardwired for.
Before you choose a path, listen to your heart and align with what you feel truly passionate about. When you do that, you will stay in harmony within yourself. You’ll find the energy, motivation and drive to reach your goals.
Perseverance
The third part of the life app deals with PERSEVERANCE. You see, life’s great results usually reward not those who dream big or get lucky, but those who persevere in actively pursuing their dream. It is how you follow through and persevere, that separates winners from losers.
Perseverance is the ingredient that converts dreams into reality. The more perseverance you develop, the better your chances of success. Perseverance will require you to go out of your comfort zone and to practice self-discipline; it will quietly demand that you keep on keeping on, even when all the odds seem to be stacked against you!
Winners know how to persevere: They stay focused, take action daily toward their goals, and press on until the results show up.
Together, alignment, passion and perseverance make for powerful results! Let’s look at a few examples:
Wangari Maathai used this APP to bring about incredible transformation in Africa. She felt passionate about destruction of the land caused by deforestation in Kenya. She was touched by the needs of rural women who reported that their streams and food supplies were drying up, and they had to walk further and further to get firewood.
Wangari Maathai developed a vision of reforestation to help her people. She started to plant trees, and recruited other women to join her in the effort.
At first, community leaders laughed at her and dismissed her. But Wangari had a vision. She passionately believed in her cause, and she persevered.
She established the Green Belt Movement to conserve the environment and improve livelihoods. She organized rural women to grow seedlings and plant trees to bind the soil and stop erosion, to find ways together to store rainwater, provide food and firewood, and earn a decent living.
Wangari also started community education programs to advocate for greater democracy and leadership accountability. Since 1977, the Green Belt Movement has planted over 51 million trees in Kenya, effectively reversing destruction of the ecosystem in east and central Africa.
It all started with one woman who was aligned with her core values, who passionately believed in her vision to alleviate human suffering, and who persevered until the results showed up. Her ALIGNMENT, PASSION AND PERSEVERANCE brought about powerful results.
Fulfilling your life purpose may not call you to distant lands, but it will call you to live from your heart’s truth.
That is what happened to Jessica Jackley shortly after she graduated from college.
Jessica Jackley heard a speech by an economist from Bangladesh who had developed the idea of micro financing: loans offered to entrepreneurs too poor to qualify for traditional bank loans.
She was so completely blown away by this concept that she quit her job out, dropped everything and moved to East Africa to find out how she could help. There, she learned about the very real problems people face throughout the third world: A farmer in Tanzania who needs $25 for seeds to plant his crops, a seamstress in Peru who needs $100 for a new sewing machine to earn a living; a rice harvester in Cambodia who needs $50 for a bicycle to get his product to market.
Jessica saw the need, and she developed a vision to help. In 2005, she co-founded Kiva.org – an organization that allows people to lend money to entrepreneurs in the US and developing countries through the internet.
On Kiva, individual lenders like you and I can sort through profiles of potential borrowers and make loans to those we find most appealing. The minimum loan is only $25, and the interest rate is 0%. Risky loans? No, not really.
The repayment rate for loans is more than 99%, and since Kiva was founded in 2005 it has had an enormous impact: some 910,000 people have pledged almost 1/2 billion dollars in loans to more than 1 million people in 72 countries. About two-thirds of Kiva’s borrowers are women who are now able to break free from the cycle of poverty.
Jessica had a vision of how she could make a difference in the world. She used the APP of ALIGNMENT, PASSION and PERSEVERANCE to launch one of the fastest growing crowd-funding social benefit websites in history. Today, Kiva empowers people around the world to feed and educate their families, to make an honest living, and to restore their pride.
Wangari Maathai and Jessica Jackley have both made enormous contributions to society, and they used the same app I’m sharing with you now. They found something they felt PASSIONATE about, they made decisions that were ALIGNED with their core values, and they PERSEVERED until they succeeded.
If they could do it, so can you. Your future beckons, the choices are yours, and now you have this APP for life.
And so, in closing, I ask you again,
What is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?
May you always live in alignment with your values, and may you pursue your dreams with passion and perseverance until they come true!
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
