by Ada Porat | Feb 22, 2016 | Decision-making, Life coaching
Life usually rewards not those who dream big, but those who persevere in actively pursuing their dream. They know that perseverance is the key that realizes dreams. I’m sure you’ve seen these winners: they’re the ones who stay focused, who take action daily to realize their dreams, and who repeat that winning formula until the results show up.
What is your dream? What is that one thing that would get you out of bed with a spring in your step? What is the living legacy you want to leave behind as a blazing trail for others to follow?
More importantly, what are you doing right now – today – to realize your dream?
Every dream starts with making a choice; yet it is the consistent work of perseverance that transforms it into reality. It is how you follow through and persevere, that separates winners from losers. What happens after you choose a goal, path or purpose, is going to determine the outcome you get.
Perseverance is the ingredient that converts dreams into reality. The more you persevere, the better your chances of success. And while developing perseverance can be summarized in three simple steps, it is not always easy to do. It requires you to go out of your comfort zone and to practice self-discipline; to keep on keeping on, even when all the odds seem to be stacked against you!
You can develop perseverance by continuously applying three simple steps: Focus, Act, and Repeat. Together, these three steps form the acronym FAR, and that is quite appropriate – when you put them into practice, they’ll take you the distance to persevere until you realize your dream. Let’s look at each of them:
Focus
Energy flows where attention goes, so focus on your goals. I learned the value of this principle when I was five, learning to ride my older brother’s bike with one leg through the frame. I’d pedal down the farm road along the fenced-in chicken coop – and how I dreaded that rough wire fence!
Try as I might, I’d end up crashing into the fence until my brother told me: ‘Focus on where you want to go, silly!’ It tried it… and it worked!
Are you focused on the possibilities and potential in your life, or are you focused on failure and fear? Pay attention to where your focus goes because that’s where you’ll end up! You don’t have to ignore potential obstacles and dangers; you simply need to acknowledge their existence, feel the fear and continue on your path anyway.
Act
“Let resolution grasp what’s possible
and seize it boldly by the hair;
it will not get away…”
These words from Goethe’s Faust emphasize the need for bold action to realize your dreams. Goals and dreams may be exciting, but until you take action to realize them, they will remain just that: pipe dreams. If you have a dream for your life, you need to take action daily to realize that dream.
What action have you taken today to move closer to your goals? Even when you cannot take bold steps at a given time, there are always smaller steps you can take. Simply do what you can, refocus, and then do some more. That’s the formula for success!
Repeat
Any personal trainer or coach will tell you that it is persistence and perseverance over time that pays off in excellence and success. In a recent interview, a well-known tennis coach was bemoaning the lack of emergent American tennis talent. When asked why, he answered that it’s due not to a lack of talent, but because of a lack of perseverance. Promising young players don’t want to put in the hard work; they don’t persevere until their talent is sufficiently honed for success.
In a world where so much can be accomplished at the push of a button, the core ingredients for success remain the same as ever.
Focus. Act. Repeat.
Continue to focus on where you want to go and take action to move you closer to you goals each day. Repeat the process, and your perseverance will burn through obstacles like butter. You can realize your dreams – so go for it!
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
by Ada Porat | Jun 22, 2015 | Conscious living, Decision-making, Fear and anxiety, Mindfulness
Here’s one good reason to slow down and watch the clouds float by on a summer’s day: when you slow down – even just enough to watch those clouds – you will change in positive ways as well.
Yes, stepping out of the rat race can change you for the better! Anxious, hurried feelings may imply a temporary sense of self-importance, but they actually rob you of the very poise you need to be self-empowered.
True self-empowerment begins with being able to choose your own direction in life. And to choose your own path, you need to become aware of the direction in which life’s current flows. A wise teacher once told me that awareness is everything. Sometimes, you need to go with the flow of the current in order to change it.
This principle applies wherever you may find yourself in life – whether caught up in the turbulence of a rapidly changing world, or swept along by an inner flood of thoughts and feelings. Like it or not, you’re going where that current goes, whether you are aware of it or not.
As long as you have no awareness of its direction, you have no real choice, but once you become aware of the current, you can respond in ways that empower you and could even change the course of events!
Slowing down allows you to become more aware of your surroundings and your place in it. It gives you the opportunity to become present with your inner guidance, an essential step toward self-empowerment. When you slow down, you can connect to the deeper meaning of life.
Singer/songwriter Neil Diamond put it this way in his song, “Slow It Down:”
“Slow it down, take your time
And you’ll find your time has a meaning…”
Your true nature is not concerned with or bound by linear time. It never feels the need to rush through life, frantically trying to fit more into every day.
When you allow the events or demands of life to dictate your schedule, you pick up your pace to keep up with the anxious feelings generated by these demands. Over time, you may identify with these urgencies as your own inner drive. You may even confuse the false sense of pressure generated by these demands, with true power. Neither is true. You are not the urgencies of your life any more than a cresting tide is the entire ocean.
Author Vernon Howard offers clear guidance to help us stop this mad dash to nowhere:
“Slow down. Relax. Dare to deliberately defy those inner screams that demand you rush nervously around. Instead, obey another quiet voice that assures you that the casual life is the truly powerful and efficient life.”
If you are ready to slow down your life, you can start with a few simple suggestions.
Beginning this very moment, intentionally separate yourself from any rushing inner condition by voluntarily stepping out of it.
Purposefully slow down by consciously reducing your usual speed:
- At half your normal gait, walk over to get your cup of coffee.
- Reach for the phone, your glass of water or your pen at half your normal speed.
- Stick to the speed limit, especially when late for an appointment or feeling rushed.
One practice I find particularly valuable is to pause a few seconds before I answer someone’s question. This conscious act to slow down allows for Higher Wisdom to guide the conversation instead of the ego to jump right in. No wonder ”fools rush in where angels dread to tread!”
Whatever the occasion, you have the power of choosing to slow down, and then to practice stepping out of or redirecting the flow of your life.
Slowing down helps you become aware of your inner self in a new and higher way. This enhanced self-awareness empowers by showing you that you are not your work, your feelings or even your accomplishments. You are limitless consciousness, and you can choose your own path and pace in life.
This summer and every day, I encourage you to slow down and step out of the rush. If you want to find what is Timeless, dare to live as though you have all the time in the world!
About the author
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
by Ada Porat | May 14, 2015 | Conscious living, Decision-making, Life coaching, Mindfulness
A lot of success coaches and motivational speakers tell you to THINK BIG. They tell you to create a big vision in order to succeed. And I agree – having a big vision is necessary to accomplish big things.
At the same time, even big things are compiled of multiple smaller components – and so I find myself coaching clients to think of small steps instead.
Whenever you are in a tight spot in life, it is important to focus on the goodness of life at the present moment. The past is over and the future is not here yet. This is the perfect time to appreciate what you do have now instead of focusing on fear or lack.
Being laid off is a case in point. If you are out of work and have been for some time, it may be difficult to think about the perfect job or the ultimate contribution you want to make in the world. At this stage of the game, you may just want a paycheck… but now is the time to think small.
This bleak season of uncertainty will pass. Make the most of it by finding small steps where you can make a difference. Spend more time with loved ones, help the children with homework, plant some flowers. You can teach yourself a new skill or take a local adult education class. Revisit your vision for your life; dream a new dream. Being unemployed may feel like a permanent condition. The fact is, it is a season that will surely pass. You are not going to be out of work forever, so take small steps in the areas where you are able to now!
Whenever a project feels huge, it’s time to think small. If the size or complexity of the project overwhelms you, focus on just the next few small steps. Locate the phone numbers you need to call… schedule the time to make the call. Outline the chapters of the book you want to write…commit to writing just one page a day. Unclutter one drawer at a time instead of thinking about uncluttering the whole house. Baby steps will get you there.
Even in business, there’s a place and time for thinking small. When thinking big, we often complicate things with too many ideas and we overwhelm ourselves.
No matter where you are in life, there is always something you can do. If you cannot tackle big things now, don’t dither in indecision – start with small steps! Here are a few pointers to help you take small steps forward with confidence:
- Pick just one or two things to focus on each day. I find that most clients are trying to do too much in too little time. As a result, few things get completed. If you commit to one or two things daily, you’ll get more done and feel less stressed.
- Revel in little things. Go out and literally smell the roses. Slow down and appreciate your surroundings. Taste your food instead of inhaling it. Have meaningful conversation instead of passing interactions. Take small steps forward with appreciation rather than big steps with fear.
- Scale down. Get rid of physical clutter as well as mental clutter. Review your obligations and decide if they still serve you. Do you need to withdraw from some? Clear your mind by doing a brain dump: put your ideas, to-dos and tolerances (those things you are tolerating) down on paper. Prioritize what you choose to do and what you choose to let go; then take small steps to simplify your life.
- Focus on being great at what you do, rather than being the best. The best is the enemy of the great, just as perfection is the enemy of the acceptable. When you choose to be great, you’ll begin to do things from a place of excellence instead of overwhelm. Small and excellent steps trump big and anxious strides in my book any day!
- Allow extra time for everything you do. If doing a task will take ten minutes, allow yourself twenty. That way, you take small steps to build buffer time into your day to cope with unexpected events. If you finish in less time than that… go watch the clouds!
About the author
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
by Ada Porat | Jan 26, 2015 | Conscious living, Cope with change, Decision-making, Fear and anxiety, Life coaching, Life transitions
You may be cruising along comfortably at work or in your relationship when – bam! – something unexpected jerks the rug out from beneath you. Setbacks happen in every life – and usually when you least expect them, right!
Research shows that setbacks and challenges occur frequently, both our personal lives and at work. In fact, it has been estimated that some major challenge shows up in the life of every person and/or organization every two to three months on average. The way you address these challenges, will ultimately determine your success or failure.
In fact, these apparent setbacks can be seen as a potential blessing in disguise. Along with the challenges they present, they also contain potential for enormous personal growth. The Greek philosopher Epictetus said that circumstances neither make nor break a person; they only reveal one to oneself.
Perhaps you find yourself backed into a corner with no solutions apparent. Or you feel as if the stream of challenges in your life never end; no sooner do you solve one problem, but you are confronted by another. What to do?
When you feel overwhelmed by challenges, it is important to remember that the ultimate purpose of life is your soul growth. Challenges will inevitably arrive within the scope of your learning and growth; the only part of the challenge you can control is your response. Your personal level of responsibility – your ability to respond – will help you rise to the challenge and continue to grow in knowledge, experience and maturity.
To stop the pain of resisting setbacks and focus instead on realizing your full potential, it is essential to learn how to effectively respond to setbacks. The better you become at solving problems, the more success you’ll experience.
One of the fundamental secrets to success is to focus single-mindedly on solutions rather than on problems. The more you think about possible solutions, the more creative you become and the more in control you’ll feel.
Success has a lot to do with your ability to solve problems. Right at this moment, you have within you everything you need to deal with every crisis you face. There’s no challenge you cannot meet, and no setback you cannot overcome by applying the appropriate strategy.
During times of setbacks and challenge, your natural response may be to withdraw or shut down. Instead, your primary responsibility is to rise to the occasion, face your challenges and strive to find a way forward.
Business coach and motivational guru Brian Tracy identified ten universal steps to manage and overcome setbacks, whether in your personal life or at work. These steps will get you out of any situation, so let’s take a look at them in more detail:
1. Stay calm. You have a wonderful mind that stores volumes of information you can access when needed. You also have access to a storehouse of emotions. Your thoughts determine the emotions you experience. When you don’t like what is happening, your first task is to control your thoughts and in so doing, to harness your feelings and emotions. Panic shuts down your neocortex, which controls your rational thinking process and pushes you into a fight, freeze or flight response instead. Don’t give in to knee-jerk reactions. See yourself as a winner and approach this problem as a test to see how you will respond. Frustrated expectations lead to negative emotions such as fear of failure and rejection. Recognize that you simply have not reached your expectations – yet – and that you do have control over how you respond to each setback. Interpret the challenge in a neutral way, and you will remain calm instead of hitting the panic button. Keep yourself calm by refusing to dramatize. This, too, shall pass! Instead of panicking, stay curious. Focus on how the challenge could be useful.
2. Be confident in your abilities. When faced with setbacks, the natural reaction is to feel stunned or to pull back. Don’t go there! Instead, remind yourself of previous times when you successfully handled challenges; recognize that you can handle this one, too. To rise above the problem, remind yourself that you can overcome it. No matter how big the setback, you can get up and start over. Yes, you can do it! When you focus on your toolbox of gifts and graces, you will become more confident.
3. Dare to move forward. Create a new vision; pluck up your courage to embrace it; then share it with supportive allies and go for it. Courage is not lack of fear, but control of fear. During setbacks, you need courage to control your fear and focus on new goals to get past the problem. Develop courage by facing your fears and doing the things you need to do. Courage follows courageous behavior. Decide what you need to do to survive and get past the challenge: reassess your options, get help to release past trauma, and then act courageously to move forward in the face of disappointment. Resolve to persist until you have solved the problem.
4. Get the facts. Accurate information will bring you calm, clarity and the ability to make optimal decisions. It will allow you to face reality, rather than the ghosts of what you’re afraid of. It is truth that sets you free, and not delusions, fantasies or stories. Avoid blaming; it is not constructive! The more factual information you have, the calmer you will feel and the more courage you’ll have for tough decisions. Focus on what you CAN do, not on what you CANNOT do; then remind yourself that whatever cannot be cured, must be endured. Never assume you have all the information or that all your information about the situation is correct; stay open to the facts. Facts don’t lie; once you have the facts, you’ll gradually find appropriate solutions and options to act on.
5. Take control. When experiencing setbacks, it is natural to respond with negativity or anger. These emotions are not constructive. Take charge of your emotions and thoughts, and then you will find the clarity to decide what to do. Taking control also requires that you take 100% responsibility for your life and responses to conditions. When you take full responsibility for your life and choices, you’ll also access your authority to make necessary changes. You will find the strength to move forward.
6. Cut your losses. To survive challenges, you need to be flexible. You must be willing to embrace change, even when it ‘s not comfortable. Don’t think in terms of win/lose; think in terms of the next step forward. About 70% of all decisions turn out not to be optimal, but they can be adapted or changed as you move forward. Knowing what you know now, what should you do differently to attract different outcomes? Get clear on that, then cut your losses and return to basics so you can start to rebuild.
7. Manage the situation. Setbacks are inconvenient, disruptive, scary and intimidating, but this is not the time to run away! Your survival is determined by how well you manage four things: you need to interrupt the dynamic, determine the scope of the damage, think in terms of solutions, and take action! To break free from fear, ask yourself what the worst possible scenario or outcome would look like; then apply your insight to the current situation.
8. Communicate constantly. A large portion of all problems are caused by lack of communication. During tough times, it becomes more important than ever for you to communicate to people around you what is happening and what needs to be done. Grab the bull by the horns and speak to others in your life about the situation you are facing. Confide in a trusted person or get professional help; the benefit of an outside perspective can be enormous during times of challenge.
9. Identify your constraints. To overcome setbacks, you need to identify constraints that are holding you back. Once your own goals and values are clear, it is easier to identify obstacles or limitations that keep you from moving forward. What is holding you back? When you identify that constraint clearly, you are able to resolve it. Research shows that a full 80% of constraints are internal (inside you) and only 20% are in circumstances outside you. By identifying constraints or excuses in your circumstances, you can eliminate them and step into your power. Relentlessly weed out these limitations and limiting beliefs, and you will become a magnet for success!
10. Tap into your Higher Power. Crisis is as good a time as any to start tapping into your Higher Power and access your limitless potential as a soul. Let this Higher Power within you burn through all obstacles and bring you to the outcomes you desire. When you’ve done all you can, your Higher Power will continue working to bring about the outcomes you desire: inner peace and optimal resolution of your situation. Take time to connect to your infinite soul, your Higher Power and your Eternal Source. Practice being still within and allow your Higher Guidance to speak to you. Sometimes your prayer may be answered as soon as you express it; other times, it takes more time. No matter how long it takes, keep believing, take action and you will see the outcomes unfolding in your life.
There’s no problem you cannot solve and no setback you cannot deal with when you focus on the resources you already have!
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
by Ada Porat | Dec 17, 2014 | Change bad habits, Conscious living, Decision-making, Life coaching, Mindfulness
The coming year will shape the destiny of every human being on this planet because it will offer every person pivotal opportunities for personal and global transformation.
The question each of us should ask is, “How will the forces guiding my life affect me in the next year?” Why? Because they are already doing that right now!
Whatever you’re working on in your life, is already working on you. Over the course of time, these forces will shape your life both on the surface and from within.
Nobody’s life is the same at the end of a year – any year – as it is at the beginning. You are building your life from the inside out even as it is working on you.
What do you plan to work on in the coming year? Getting clear on the purpose and plan for your soul is essential because it will ultimately direct where you end up over the course of the next year.
Business philosopher Jim Rohn put it this way: “If you go to work on your goals, your goals will go to work on you. If you go to work on your plan, your plan will go to work on you. Whatever good things we build, will end up building us.”
These are some valuable lessons to be gleaned here.
First is that life is a process, not a destination. Every year is simply a measure of life, a slice of the big picture. Instead of falling into the trap of reductionism and reducing life to a game of basic outcomes, why not become more conscious of the process, the journey?
You are building a life, not a year. The kind of life you build is going to be determined by the kind of goals and plans you work on, because they’ll work on you as well.
And that’s the second lesson: Your choice of goals means much more than just what you accomplish. You are choosing what you become, too!
Deepak Chopra has said that the activities on the surface of our lives distract us from the deeper work of soul making. You do not need to get caught up in the distractions of life to the detriment of your soul! This year, resolve to see your life as a sacred process of soul making. Let that Higher awareness guide your life journey. You are not meant to simply ACHIEVE something; you are here to BECOME something. And that process happens along the way, not at some magical destination.
The third lesson is this: it’s not just the good things we build that matter, but everything we build. They all matter because they all work on us.
If you use shame, blame, guilt or fear as building blocks for your life, that’s what you’ll ultimately have. If you avoid the effort of introspection, personal honesty and spiritual alignment, you may think you’re not building anything, but you are – and you’re not going to like the result, so why even go there?
On the other hand, if you build toward your highest potential, you facilitate the unfolding of your best life yet.
Reaching your highest potential is your soul’s ultimate purpose. It is revealed to you within the process of seeking to fulfill your highest potential, service and creativity. When you seriously engage in the work of healing the wounded psyche with Truth, you enable your highest potential to radiate from your core.
These are the goals that ought to guide you, for they will reveal the true blueprint of your life. They will direct your path, your purpose and your potential to bring about the highest unfolding of your being.
If you’re going to build something in your life during the next twelve months, make it something that you love and respect. It’ll shape you into someone you can love and respect!
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
by Ada Porat | Nov 17, 2014 | Body Mind Spirit, Change bad habits, Conscious living, Cope with change, Decision-making, Fear and anxiety, Life coaching, Life transitions, Mindfulness, Spirituality
Feeling stuck in life at this time? Frustrated? Take a moment to really feel what is going on. You are not stuck… you are simply constrained.
Yes, the old way of doing things no longer works, and you are trying to adjust to radical new ways of looking at life, doing things, and even living.
Outside yourself, the whole world is going through a spin cycle. Deep wounds in the collective psyche of mankind are surfacing, releasing both great horror and amazing opportunity. Societies hunger not for war or peace, but for Truth to cut through illusion and bring about spiritual healing at the deepest levels of being.
Never before in the history of the planet has there been such a clarion call for healing to avert global destruction. The time for dilly-dallying and empty promises is over. It is time to heal our world – starting with ourselves!
The truth is that, throughout this time of constraint and upheaval, there are unseen forces holding you steady while you learn to run this new kind of energy… the energy of oneness with Divine purpose. It is your Divine connection, hosted in a human shell. Long ago, before you ever came into this life, you chose to embody this energy at this time. It is your contribution to the shift of the ages, and now is your time to fulfill that agreement.
The energy of Divine oneness or unity is the most powerful force in the Universe. It is powerful enough to constrain you when you try to separate from Divine guidance at your core and assert your human will.
In the old way of life, we learned to accomplish goals by asserting our human, ego wills in the external reality. We were conditioned to be willful and determined, wanting whatever we chose to have when we decided to have it.
This way no longer works. When we push forward through our human ego in the new energy that surrounds us now, there are numerous obstacles constraining us.
To move past these constraints, we have to give up the drive to accomplish things by sheer force of will. Instead, we need to align with the power of All That Is. We need to surrender to trust: trust in the Divine, in Higher Guidance, in Spirit, God… whatever you choose to call the essential life force energy.
When we choose to trust, the energy of the ego yields and aligns to a bigger plan – the higher picture of Divine perfection. From that place of alignment, we are able to flow with creative energies to create a higher reality than we could have ever conceived of before.
It is no longer possible to more forward in ego and still make spiritual progress. The constraining force of Spirit will block your movement at every turn – the old ways of doing need to be surrendered to embrace higher ways of being.
Spirit will get you through this time of transition, no matter how difficult it feels. Those same unseen forces that hold you steady now, can and will lift you out of the illusion of despair. All it takes is for you to let go of the old way of using power, and to embrace the path of alignment – the pathway of trust and allowing.
We are living in a very different reality now than we were in even five years ago. The old life with its hopes and dreams, has been filed away in the archives of All That Is. To keep looking for it, merely deters our progress.
Instead, now is the time to embrace what shows up in your life moment by moment. Look for new ways to reframe things, new tools to do things with.
Go inward. Drink deep from the wellspring of life. Let the timeless wisdom and healing energy of sacred teaching wash over you to renew your soul. Develop a dialogue with Spirit and ask for guidance and clarity.
Stay present in the moment and allow the answers to flow to you through circumstances.
When action is indicated, do it. When circumstances open up for you, move forward. And when doors close, don’t try to break through them. Sometimes, we need to spend a while living in the in-between: learning to let go of the need to control, the need to logically understand.
At times like these, we need to ask ourselves what we really want and why…even as we surrender the need to know how it will come about. We need to simply align to the Eternal Presence and be present, be patient, and be still.
You don’t lack power. You are a powerful being. What you lack is remembrance. There is nothing wrong with you that complete remembrance will not heal. Like survivors who buried the unbearable agony of trauma beneath a layer of amnesia until they are ready to process it, we have chosen not to remember everything at once. As we proceed on the path we are shown, more is revealed to us. Through the integration and healing of each memory that surfaces, we reclaim our wholeness and power.
Powerful new healing modalities and tools for personal growth are emerging at this time to support our transformation. We are indeed blessed to live at this pivotal time in history – and this blessing carries with it the clarion call to learn, to grow, to heal and to transform our world. Do you hear the call?
For many centuries, mystics lived on the fringe of society. They did not mix with the masses or participate in affairs of the world. This has all changed. Today, the level of consciousness on the planet has tipped the scales to offer potential for unprecedented growth and change.
Spiritually awakened beings are called to participate in this worldwide shift by becoming mystics in the marketplace – not on the mountain or in the monastery. We are called to be the change we desire to see in the world, as Gandhi said.
To answer the call, you need to learn how to commune with your soul to access the inner guidance that is stirring there. Every change that you wish to see in society starts with you and the field of consciousness that you are holding.
You are called to be the very change you desire to see in the world, and you change the world around you through the power of your evolving consciousness. As you consciously evolve in response to the Divine nature within, you hold the higher energies of the life force field wherein everyone’s consciousness can evolve. In a world crying for healing, there is no greater service you can offer!
©Copyright Ada Porat. For more information, visit https://adaporat.com. This article may be freely distributed in whole or in part, provided there is no charge for it and this notice is attached.
